ActionJackson

Welcome Evelyn Rose

2012-02-09T12:19:00.001-05:00

Introducing our baby girl, Evelyn Rose Dodge. Born January 3, 2012, 3:23 pm -- 8 lbs, 7 oz -- 21 inches

"Evelyn" a grown up name with the sweet nickname "Evie", and "Rose" a family name from both Jason and my family. Rose Winski was Jason's grandmother who was well loved by all in his family. Rose Fox was my great aunt, the favorite of my mother and her sisters (who would have liked to pass her name on, but were unable to because they didn't have enough daughters or it clashed with the last name or whatever reason). I remember visiting her home when I was very young and playing with her toys, but she passed away when I was only 5, so my own memory of her is very thin and fragmented.

So far, Evelyn has been a very content child who sleeps much of the day and much of the night. During the in between times (7-11 am and 5-10 pm) she eats frequently and between eating is happy to snuggle in her parents' arms or to settle onto her bed or swing. This is a very helpful quality in a child who has 2 brothers who need to eat or be dressed or snuggled during those same times, and patience is a quality that will still be useful when she's grown.

Evie has her daddy's dark hair, right now fuzzy and unruly, but sure to be tamed as it lengthens. She has her mother's blue-grey eyes. Maybe they'll change into the sky blue eyes of both her grandfathers or even the hazel eyes of her father, but for now they are momma's eyes. Evelyn's fingers and toes are oh so long and slender. They are neither her mother's hands nor her father's. I think they might've come from her Nana and her Nana's mother. I've been joking that she has giant kangaroo feet, and they are so long that her knit newborn baby booties had to be stretched onto her feet. Today she most resembles her daddy and her brother Jackson, but that could change as well.

Speaking of big brothers, they adore her. Jackson is anxious to teach her about the world. He brings her objects to show her how they work or play. He thinks she is the cutest baby ever to live, and so he calls her "Cute" instead of "Evie". Jonah loves rubbing her fuzzy head, always rubbing her fuzzy head. He's only now starting to develop some of the toddler jealousy, but not enough to over ride his urge to rub her fuzzy head.

Thanks to everyone who has wished us well. We are overjoyed to have Evelyn join our family.

Early morning conversations.

2011-07-06T08:19:00.000-04:00

We're camping at Cape Cod (Hurray!)
Jackson and I are up, and Jonah and Jason are asleep. I wanted to distract Jack so he wouldn't wake everyone up.
"Jackson, do you want to go for a walk?"
"Nah, I don't want to."
"What if we call it 'Exploring'?"
"hey, yeah. I learned about exploring on Diego!"

Happy 10 Months, Jonah Baby!

2011-02-06T22:13:00.001-05:00

My Jonah Baby has just turned 10 months old (yesterday). The tiny little person who came to us as what seemed like an adorable blank slate, is now an exploding personality. The personality is his own, and is most definitely NOT Jackson's. Some of this was apparent from day one when we brought home a sweet content baby who turned into Mr. Hyde when he became either hungry or tired, and who could roll over at birth. Jonah still wants what he wants when he wants it. (Diaper changes are NOT what he wants). Jonah is also fearless.

Just before Christmas, Jonah started pulling up on things. He had been a belly crawler, so at first he could just pull up to stand on his knees. Once he built up his strength on his knees, he started using them to get around and then started pulling up to feet. Now he is usually standing up and most often uses this new ability to turn the TV on and off or to find and collect small objects in his mouth. He's not quite ready to let go, but he is cruising a bit and will bend down to get things. Every time he performs a new feat of strength, he laughs and glows with pride.

This last week, he's been saying "Muh-Ma" in EARNEST. Sometimes when he says it, he looks at me with recognition and adoration. But most of the time he says it because he wants something: to be picked up, to not have his diaper changed, for his parents to come back in the room with him, to get out of a crib. I think he's been listening to Jackson, who calls out "Mommeee" whenever he wants something or needs a problem solved. Jonah is indiscriminate with his Muh-Ma's, and lets out a string if them when either parent leaves.

Jonah is also a good eater, unlike Jackson (who is a good drinker and subsists on a diet of chocolate milk, juice, and peanut butter). Jonah likes vegetables--broccoli and cauliflower, potatoes, sweet potatoes, green beans. He's not a fan of fruit yet, the tartness makes his toes curl, but he likes fruit mixed with other things like baby cereal or blended into a smoothie. Tonight, he ate 1/4 cup of baby cereal and plums, then ate more sweet potato and salmon than I did.

Jackson and Jonah are good brothers together already. Jonah likes to chase Jackson around and Jackson likes to say, "Ahh, Jonah. Jonah is so cute." Then he will spend hours trying to make him laugh. If Jonah laughs at something once, Jackson will keep doing it in the hopes of keeping him laughing, long past the point where Jonah gets bored of the gag.

I love to just watch Jonah move. He glides along the floor at amazing speeds with his commando crawl. Now with his standard crawl, he shimmies around so smoothly. He likes to pick up objects with his left hand and use his little right pointer finger to touch things. He likes to wiggle his finger against his lips making raspberry noises, and likes to have his people do it back. He likes to shake his head back and forth with his people, and he likes to dance. (At our weekly family dinners, we turn on the music and dance in the kitchen together after dinner. This is a tradition I hope sticks as the boys grow. Jackson made up a new dance move this week where he swings his hips around, so I pulled out some Elvis for him.)

Jonah still has his little baby mohawk, but the rest of his hair is catching up, so its not so noticable unless there's a breeze. And his hair is red, dark red, auburn I guess. It's beautiful. His eyes are a deep hazelly blue, and his skin is extra fair like his dad's.

Sea Shells

2010-12-12T22:10:00.000-05:00

Jackson came downstairs today, very excited about the conch shell he'd reached from the bathroom windowsill. He had it pressed against his ear, listening to the waves. I had a listen too, then handed it back. He took it, yelled into it, then held it back up to his ear. Every 10 seconds, he pulled it away to freshen the echo by yelling into it and couldn't be dissuaded.
Love that boy!

Beginning Reading

2010-12-10T10:11:00.001-05:00

Jackson learned his first two sight words this week. The first word is
"Toy" as in Toy Story. (Thank you Disney/Pixar logos). The second word
is "Joy", also pronounced "Toy Story".

"The Mother of all Curse Words" --blog post #200

2010-12-01T02:34:00.001-05:00

A few weeks ago, I was buckling the kids in the car. Jackson picked up some card, then said, "this is a pain in the f-ing a-." I said, "what did you say?" and he repeated his previous statement. His statement was so random, so deliberate, and said in such a way that I knew he was trying the new words out, testing my parenting, and aware that he said something that just maybe was outside his current boundaries--something that I as a parent couldn't just let slide and hope it would go away. I took a deep breathe, snapped Jonah's buckle, and started my quickly conceived speech about that not being a nice thing to say. I was told, "well, Daddy thinks it's a nice thing to say"
So great, he ratted his daddy out. Of course he had learned this from daddy. I don't use this kind of language in front of my child and even if it had come from me, I leave the f- out of this particular phrase. Then there's the dilema of how to punish him. My stern lecture would only go so far, time out was insufficient and uninforcible since I clearly wasn't going back inside for 3 minutes on the stair. I couldn't see any other recourse besides the threat of soap.
I told him again that it wasn't a nice thing to say, not for little boys and not for mommy or daddy either. I told him those were dirty words and the only solution was to clean his mouth up by washing it with soap (trying to convince myself that it was a real connection and very reasonable punishment). I told him if mommy or daddy said it to remind us that it wasn't a nice thing to say and we would be in trouble too. Then I got in the car myself, hoped my speech was impressionative, and wondered how to break the news to my husband in a way that would serve to put him on notice as well.
A few days later, Jackson was bouncing around the house, and told me he might "fall and break his f-ing head." I repeated my speech and again listened to his arguement that daddy thought it was a nice thing to say. I repeated my speech with emphasis on the soap. 30 minutes later, Jack was jumping on the bed chanting about falling and "breaking his f-ing head".
I put Jonah down and let out a deep sigh of disbelief. Disbelief of what I was hearing from my 3 1/2 year old, disbelief that I was really going to have to get the soap out, disbelief that my husband hadn't tempered his own language. Visions of that scene from "The Christmas Story" flashed through my mind as I picked up my sweet baby boy and carried him into the bathroom, his fate sealed. I gave him a longer speech. He was unphased. I showed him a bar of soap, then had to explain just what it was since we use a body wash with the kids and liquid soap at the sink. I had to hold him down to attempt to put it in his mouth. He grimmaced, and I touched the tiniest bit to his tooth. He ran away complaining, but did not repeat his chant. I took the next opportunity to again chastise my husband. Jason has since been moping around, wearing his 'worst father in the world' medallion.
Those of you who know my Jackson know he loves to play with my iTouch. He calls it "mine game". If I take it to work, I come home hearing "mom, do you know where mine game is?" in the most pleading little voice. I have it loaded up with toddler aps. He plays them all, but mostly he plays Pocket God. I recognize that torturing pygmies is a little mature of a theme. I'm a little embarrassed that when we visited Utah, he showed everyone as he said, "see the zombies eat the kidneys brains and that makes more zombies". I rationalize that playing Pocket God is good for him because he has to take multi-sequenced steps to a given reaction, it's bigger than just cause and effect.
He also uses the YouTube ap to watch videos of his own giggling self, muppets singing 'Ma Nama Na', or Donald Duck shorts. He saved a video of someone playing a Roger Rabbit video game to the YouTube favorites. I saw him watching it a couple times, and it was boring so I tuned it out after a few seconds. Normally I let him use the iTouch on his own. He likes to play it when he's "boring" because I'm cooking or taking care of Jonah or whatever. A few nights ago, he was sitting next to me playing with the iTouch. He turned on the Roger Rabbit video. About 3 seconds beyond the point I'd been tuning out, the narrator said, "This right here is a pain in the f-ing a-". I think a "fall and break my f-ing head" might've been in the upcoming dialogue. Instead of waiting to listen for that, I snatched the itouch from Jackson's protesting fingers and erased the link from the memory.
Jason is relieved that he's no longer the worst parent in the world. He handed that title to me for letting my sweet little boy have unsupervised access to the Internet. YouTube. What was I thinking?! It could've been much worse, right?! So now we're both on notice, paying a little more attention to our language and to our little parrot's viewing habits. This parenting thing is gonna be a long looong road, sigh.

documenting life in motion

2010-11-27T17:48:00.002-05:00

Here are some videos from the last couple of months. We had some after dinner silliness on the last barbecue-able day of the year (or so we thought at the time).

Here is some dancing from Jackson. Just the first 30 seconds are watchable. The last minute involves trying to get the skeleton to glow in the dark. I think this is a different night than the previous video.

Jonah crawling. This is about a month ago, when he only used his left leg. You can tell by the grunting that it took considerable effort to propel himself. Now he's moved on to using both feet. His range tripled, and the grunting has passed.

Jonah taking a bath last week. He splashes the daylights out of the tub, but on this night could not splash without holding the crab in his teeth. By the way, I LOOOVE this tub. It has always kept him upright and no slips. I put him in it dry every morning when I get ready for school.

And one more, from tonight..

Making pie

2010-11-24T17:00:00.000-05:00

Me: Jack, we've got work to do tonight. We've got to make pies.
Jack: yay! Is it gonna be bacon pie?! Or frosting pie with cookies?!

Adventures at Sea

2010-10-09T23:11:00.000-04:00

Two Sundays ago, it was both "Wife Appreciation Day" and "Talk Like a Pirate Day". Coincidentally, we already had made thematic plans. Jason got out of bed in the morning and made a big breakfast including bacon and hash browns (for him) and french toast (for me). After breakfast, we loaded up the car, strapped our canoe to the roof, and headed to the lake. "Arr, we be settin' sail."

It was a beautiful day, and there was hardly anyone at the lake. Seemed perfect. We got the canoe loaded up with the boys. Jason suggested that we just take Jonah in his carseat. This didn't seem like the best idea, but he was so chill in his chair that I went with it. Jason sat at the front of the canoe to paddle/steer, I sat in the middle with Jonah, and Jackson sat at the other tip.

Jason pushed us off the dock and as soon as we had cleared land, our yellow canoe became a yellow submarine. "Arr, we be ship wrecked. Marooned!" OK, it didn't actually sink. It just dumped us all overboard. One of those moments where a fraction of a second seems to take an eternity and yet you are powerless to do anything to help yourself in that eternity. I fixed my eyes on Jonah who was dumped upside down in the lake, still strapped to his chair. I quickly grabbed him and stood knee deep in the lake watching Jason pick up Jack and carry him to shore. Seeing that we were all safe, I laughed. Guess it was too soon, and Jason let me know just how funny it was NOT. He went back in the water to rescue our stuff including our camera and his blackberry.

We hauled everything on shore, dried off the kids, endured humiliation from the 4 groups of cars we saw, and decided to get the little ones home and come back for the canoe. Jason made all sorts of threats about how he was taking his shotgun out to take care of the canoe. We've never liked that boat. It was supposedly a racing canoe, and always felt unsteady. I'm surprised it had never dumped us out before, but it is a canoe and supposedly its hard to capsize those, right?

It was about 2 in the afternoon when we came home, and Jason went back for the canoe around 4. He came home empty handed. Someone had stollen our canoe in the middle of the afternoon in our quiet neighborhood. Acts of piracy committed against us! I drove by the lake in the morning to see if it was returned. Maybe some kids had just taken it out for a ride and left it on shore. Nope, it was definitely stolen.

We are taking heart in the knowledge that the boat is cursed, and hope Karma sees fit to visit the real pirates soon and often.

Baby Hugs

2010-09-30T18:02:00.000-04:00

Jonah is lying on his belly next to me. He is leaning over to rest his head against my chest for 3 seconds followed by 30 seconds of laughter and cooing. It's like he's saying, "Look, Mom! I did it! I gave you a hug all by myself!"
I love you, baby.

The Unanswerable Why's (a new series)

2010-09-14T08:19:00.000-04:00

"Mo-om, why do you roll your eyes around in circles like wheels?"

More on Cloth Diapers

2010-09-13T23:01:00.000-04:00

It's been just 3 months since my last post on cloth diapers, but a friend just inquired about them. Here are my current thoughts:

With child number 2, I am still a lover of cloth.
I wanted to use cloth for the reasons Helene sited (environmental benefits, etc) but couldn't get over the grossness factor of my foggy memories of my mom using cloth, so I really didn't consider it. With Jackson, we had so many blowouts (at least daily). I was in the Papaya Patch trying out baby carriers when my baby blew through a carrier (yes, we bought it and loved it!) the woman helping me mentioned that cloth diapers would probably help me with the blowouts. I gave her an incredulous look, but asked a little more about it. A few days later, I ordered a try it kit from Cotton Babies. Once I switched, I spent much less time handling poo.

Now I'll sometimes go months without using a disposable diaper. When I first made the switch, I went 4 months without a disposable, and only used them when we were on vacation for a week. During that week, I missed the cloth a lot. I missed cloth wipes even more.

To start off, I'll reference my previous blog postings about fluff.
http://actionjackson-d.blogspot.com/search/label/cloth%20diapers

I guess I have this to add:

With Jackson, I used Chinese or Indian unbleached prefolds and covers. Most of my covers are Bummis Whisper Wraps plus a few ProWraps and a Thirsties. The people who like Thirsties and ProWraps like the gussetts around the thighs, but my babies are so big that the gussetts don't really give any added benefit. We didn't have leg leaks with any of them.
Using cloth, I had a single blowout over more than 2 years. I guess we had frequent wet leaks at night, but they were very minor. Jackson saved up his nursing for overnights, so there was a lot of liquid coming out. The main leak path was at the top of the diaper in front. Because of the bulk of the diaper, hemp liner (for overnight), and folded over excess diaper, there was an inch offset where the cover didn't touch his skin. So the wetness would wick from the diaper onto the front of his shirt. It didn't soak the bed, and we just lived with it since it was better than the alternative with disposables.

With Jonah, even though he's almost as big as Jackson, the prefolds and covers seem big on him. I have a variety pockets and what not that we are using now. They're not quite as good as the prefolds at keeping things in, but they are better than disposables. We don't have problems with wetness leaks during the day and blowouts are still pretty rare. At night, I can't find anything that keeps the wetness leaks in--not prefolds, pockets, extra liners, or disposables. Right now, I'm giving disposables another go at it, and suffering frequent early morning poo blowouts as a result. In a few days, I'll switch back.

It's a good idea to think of diapering as a system. When you are starting out, get a variety of diapers and find out what works best for your little one. This is what is in my current stash and what I think of them:

BumGenius 3.0 One Size Pocket Diapers. These are a great pocket diaper. They pioneered the One-Size system. The diapers have a series of extra snaps on the front that allow you to adjust the rise so that the diapers will fit size newborn through 30 pounds. In my mind, it doesn't make sense to use CD on a newborn because with how quickly my babies grow, they would only be in that size for 2 months. But with one-size diapers, you don't have to get a new set, just undo the snaps. Many brands now offer the one-size feature. These come with a thick microfiber insert for everyday use plus a second insert (doubler) for overnights. The single insert for day is great, but I don't think even the doubler is enough for overnight. These are maybe $18 each.

Happy Heiny's One size Pocket Diapers. These are very similar to the BumGenius. I like them a little better because the waist band is thicker and the velcro is covered up so it can't rub on the babies tummy. These cost a little more than BumGenius, $20-$23.

Cutie Baby One Size 2-in-1 Diaper. These are ultra cute. They attempted a few new features. The liner is sewn to the back of the diaper so it comes out to dry and you don't have to look for it in the wash (no big deal). The pocket opening is bigger, so they are easier to stuff. They had a great idea with the velcro, the hook side detaches, so you take it off for washing and avoid having a long string of covers come out of the wash. Unfortunately, we are having mysterious leaks with these. I don't know what the cost of these is, I got a babysteal on them.

gDiapers hybrid diapers. There is a review of these on my blog. The idea is that you have a cloth cover and a disposable, flushable, biodegradable insert. I don't get the flushable part, but they now offer a cloth insert instead. I don't have their inserts. I've been using my extra doublers from the bumgenius or 2 microfiber shop rags folded in thirds. I really like these, they have a nice fit and are the trimmest diaper around because the absorbent layers are only in the center, there is very little material on the sides. Drawbacks are that these don't come in one-size and they seem to run small. I was gifted a hand me down set of newborn size and I acquired several mediums. I fear Jonah will be in larges any day now. $15 per cover.

GroBaby one size diapers. These are weird. Instead of a pocket, they have a snap in cloth insert. They are cute, but I think they run small. I am relegating ours to the diaper bag we don't use much. The rise seems too short, and I've seen Jonah's little bum crack peaking out. My friend who has petite babies is loving these for her 2 year old. I don't know the cost, I got them from babysteals too.

Blueberry Minky size small pocket diaper. I know these have been a favorite of friends, and I found some on clearance in size newborn. Sadly they didn't work at all for Jonah, and I retired them before he outgrew them. Price is on the high side.

Prefolds and Covers. These have been the most effective diapers for us. They are also the cheapest (prefold $2.50, cover $11, doubler for overnight $3, Snappi $2.50). They are also the bulkiest diapers. People sometimes complain about how difficult they are to use. You have to fold them (we like the newspaper fold) and there are a few options, then you secure them either by being quick with the cover, using pins, or a Snappi. Then put a cover over them for waterproofing. There's a little learning curve, but once you start using them, it becomes second nature. We used these almost exclusively with Jackson. I eventually got some pocket diapers, and Jason would never use the pocket diapers because things worked so well with the prefold he didn't feel the need to switch. Point is if my husband is willing to stick with it, it must not be that hard.

Prefolds are available with the following options all priced similarly. Bleached (bright white) or unbleached (natural beige). Chinese (blue or green seams depending on size) or Indian (natural beige seams, a little ofter than the Chinese) or Hemp (natural beige felt, these don't work with Snappis) or Gerber (do not bother trying to use these as actual diapers). The snappy is a stretchy T shaped thing with fastener like those used for elastic bandages on each end. They are amazing! Then you need to add a cover for waterproofing. I liked the Bummis best for my chubby babies. The ones I used go on like disposable diapers. Other options are Dappi's, which are old fashioned plastic pants. They are super cheap ($2) but are a mess for a poopy diaper. I have a few that I got for emergencies when I first started using cloth. They now reside in the bottom of a drawer. There is also something called a Wool Soaker. These are usually handmade, lanolized wool. People who use them love them. I don't think I would like them.

You can sub the prefold for a fitted or contour diaper. These go on like a disposable, but still need a cover. I have one Kissaluvs fitted diaper. It fits well and is cute and effective. But it is bulky. We rarely use it. I keep it on reserve in case we have diaper rash, then I let my baby wear it around without a cover so his bum gets to air out a bit. I stay on top of things and change it right away. Cost varies up to $10

Generally, people recommend using a cover for several diaper changes, until it gets poopy. My trial kit came with 2 covers, and instructions to alternate, letting one hang and air out in between changes. Reusing covers will make CD's much cheaper. I didn't like this at all, the covers had gotten damp and retained a pee smell. I always use a fresh cover and think its icky not to. My friend using GroBaby diapers reuses those covers. I think it would be smellier with those than with my Bummis because they have a mesh lining. The gDiapers also recommend reusing covers. They say to wipe them out with a wipe between changes. I tried it, and they were better than the Bummis because you could wipe them. But the gDiapers waterproofing is a little bit porous, so if you let the diaper go very long without changing, some moisture seems to seep through. Not enough to be a leak, but enough to make reusing a cover too far on the icky side for me.

Cloth diapers are like a diapering system. You have to adjust what works with the time of day and the size and shape of your baby.

Cost: Much cheaper than disposables if you consider that you'll spend $50+ on sposies a month. A good stash of cloth will cost around $300 or about 1/2 that if you buy used. So its 6 months worth of expense for 2+ years of diapers. Makes sense even for a single child. I recommend enough diapers for 3+ days so you only have to add 2 loads of wash a week, that's about 20 diapers for a baby over 3 months old. With a newborn you'll go through about 12 diapers a day at first. Even if you don't have as many as you'd like, you could start part time diapers with some One-Sizes while your stash grows. I find that the 2 loads of diapers a week is infrequent enough that I don't feel burdened by the extra laundry. I'm much more likely to get the diapers folded than our clothes. I usually have Jonah on the changing table while I fold and put away the diapers around him.

Washing: Breast milk poo being water soluble, so wash your diapers without a second thought for the first 6 months. I used to use Method detergent, but we were having some odor buildup. I switched to ALL free (it's rated decently by the CD detergent raters). I think its working better than the Method. Use about 1/2 the detergent you would for a regular load. Do not use fabric softener on your cloth. You can use vinegar, although it may not be very good for the waterproofing. You can add baking soda, oxyclean, or borax. I don't bother unless I'm trying to strip off buildup or odors. I haven't done this yet for Jonah's diapers. I just dump my wetbag into the washer then throw the bag in too, do a cold water rinse cycle, followed by a warm wash cycle. Diaper manufactures usually recommend drying the cloth and hanging the covers, unless its an AIO then dry the whole thing. If you can dry an AIO, I figure you can dry any cover. Sometimes I hang them, but if I'm in a hurry I will put everything in the dryer. If I have excess time and its sunny, I will hang the diapers outside. The sun really does fade poo stains. After they are dry, I put them in the dryer for a few minutes to soften up. I have never checked my diapers for suds.

Once we are feeding solids, my diapering system will add a cellulose liner to the diaper next to the baby. When there is poo, I just lift it off and put it in the diaper pail (or flush, but not with septic) then wash the diaper. Saves me the hassle of spraying the dirty diaper or rinsing in the toilet. Tasks I don't want to do and I know Jason wouldn't do. These liners are made by a few brands and some are softer than others. They are inexpensive.

Folding. Don't over commit here. I fold my prefolds in half and load up the diaper stacker. I have a bunch of fabric cubes from Ikea that I keep the rest of the diapers in. If I'm feeling energetic, covers are folded neatly and lined up in their cube. If I'm in a hurry, they get shoved in. Having the cubes keeps things looking neat even when I don't have time to fold and line up my stash. I do preload my pocket diapers and fold them, sometimes just in half sometimes tucking the tabs in so they look more neat. For wipes, I use cheap baby washcloths. I fill a 6" cube with them (no folding required), and they poof out the top. It actually looks neat, and they are easy to grab. Next to them I have an old wipes container full of water with a couple of drops of tea tree oil in. I just dunk a few wipes, ring them out, and use them. For travel, I use disposable wipes and usually wash them with the rest, then pull them out of the dry and clean laundry. I have a toilet paper holder that I hang the cellulose liners on. For dirties, I use a Bummis wetbag. For travel, I have a small wetbag, but just one. Most of the time I use a gallon storage bag (not a ziplok) and knot the top of it.

Happy Diapering!

Mohawks

2010-09-09T23:45:00.000-04:00

I keep seeing little boys with faux hawks, and have been holding in my rant. I think its a stupid haircut, it's so Angelino Jolie's kids circa 2007, and on some level I am surprised that so many people give it to their children. Then I come back to the reality that 7 year old boys tend to select their own haircuts. The boys in my generation wore such things as "spiked", "ducktail", and "mullet" (I bow my head in shame).

I just noticed that my own dear Jonah is sporting a sooweeet baby hawk underneath his combover. So today I'm hating the faux hawk a little less and thinking I should put a bit of effort into reversing the combover Jason insists on and instead showing off Jonah's hawk.

Preschool!!!

2010-08-31T22:03:00.000-04:00

Happy 1st Day of Preschool, Jackson-baby

2010-08-22T21:07:00.000-04:00

I was just showing Jackson how to play Here Is the Church and Here Is the Steeple, Open the Doors and See All the People...

He said, "Uh, Mommy...Do they run away in cars?"

We had Jonah's 4 month appointment yesterday. He measured 26.5 inches long and 18 pounds, 1 ounce. That makes his 90% for weight and 86% for height, or in other words, the little one. He's been sitting up more. He can sit for a couple of minutes now, but you have to be nearby because he could tumble over at any moment. He hadn't rolled over since his first month of life. I guess he got too chunky and couldn't do it anymore. Yesterday, he was playing super baby and did roll. I think it was an accident, because he looked really surprised. I think he'll get the idea and start rolling again very soon.

One Sunday

2010-08-01T22:04:00.000-04:00

It's 9:15 on a Sunday. Both boys are upstairs sleeping. This is a small, but big feeling victory. Evenings have been rough lately with 2 kids and 1 parent, and poor Jackson hasn't been asleep before 11:00 in many nights. I carried his blinky sleepy body upstairs and laid down with him for a few minutes to get him to sleep. I was watching his sweet sleeping face and reflecting that today had been a pretty good day. That's not what I'd thought at 11:30 this morning, or at 7 or 8 this evening, those times were a bit more stressful, but the day was also full of many perfect moments. I guess that's why I chose this hectic life with the busy but fulfilling job, the longish commute to the country, and the 2 little boys that fill every waking moment with activity and make working opposite hours from my husband a necessity. Mixed in with all the chaos is a little bit of perfection.

This morning, I got up with the boys and changed diapers, got dressed, and made breakfast. Simple breakfast with chocolate milk and pb&j--the breakfast Jackson most requests, and the one he rarely eats the solid portion of. Nothing special today. Jackson didn't put enough chocolate in the milk, and when I told him to hurry and put the chocolate in, he thought I meant to put it away and returned it to the refrigerator. Then he complained that I hadn't shaken his glass up, and I explained what had happened, so he brought out the chocolate and we tried again with more success. After guzzling the milk, he took a tiny nibble of his sandwich. Then he took too big a bite, and had to spit that out. He took another tiny nibble, but that was it for the sandwich.

I decided to take the boys for a walk today since its finally cooled down enough to go outside. After much fussing on poor over tired Jonah's part and much complaining about which shoes I told him to put on on Jackson's part, I managed to tuck Jonah into the ergo carrier and head out the door. Once we were out, Jackson (who has been pretty obnoxious and attention seeking since Jonah arrived) calmed right down. He held my hand almost the entire trip. He told me he was glad we'd left the stroller home and he said, "Mom, I like having walks with you.". Jonah fell asleep almost immediately (Cheers! This is the first time he's really liked being in the ergo, being big enough to stick his legs out helps, I guess). We only saw 1 biker on our walk today, the birds were out singing en mass, and we found some blackberries on the trail.

Back home an hour later, Jonah and I were hanging out on the futon. I was lying on my back, and Jonah was sitting on my belly lying against my bent legs. Jack came in with this pull along alligator xylophone we have. He was making a terribly commotion on the xylo-gator, then turning around and using his plastic saw on the coffee table to make a rasping noise--back and forth between the two. Every couple of minutes, he'd stop and with a giant grin ask me, "Was that good?" I would tell him what a terrific musician he was. First time, he said, "I'm not a musician, I'm a music player." So I explained how they were the same thing. He'd ask about his performance, I'd praise him, we'd pound it. Repeat, repeat, repeat.

Then it was 11:30, and Jonah got overtired (again), and I tried to get him asleep. Jack kept coming in and turning on the lights and finding the noisiest toys he could get his hands on: xylo-gator, click-clack crocodile, elephant sorter with extra crank noises. Add the ringing phone. It was my mom asking about my trip out next week. The phone woke Jason, and I dumped the crying baby on his chest so I could talk to my mom.
When I made it back to the bedroom, Jason had one boy giggling, and the other squeeling delightedly. There's a picture of this and if I extract it from Jason's phone, I'll post it here. Then Jason was getting Jonah to sleep. He gave him a binky (Yay! he takes one now) and was talking to him in a whisper. I took noisy Jack down the hall.

After Jonah was down, we went downstairs for lunch/breakfast. Jason had cocoa puffs, I had an Amy's burrito with cheese and salsa, and Jack had crackers cheese and raisins. It occurred to me that Jackson's lunch was a variation on a luchables theme, but the crackers were low salt and whole grain and cheese and raisins balanced out the meal--maybe lunchables aren't so bad. After lunch, I was hit by a narcoleptic wave of fatigue. Chose to sleep with my baby over pulling weeds. Jonah and I slept until 4. I woke to feed him, then had Jason take him away so I could sleep more, and would've if the phone hadn't rung and startled me awake.

Jason left at 4:30 or 5, and the rest of us went into typical hectic evening mode. Try to keep two boys happy, feed Jonah hourly, make dinner for myself and Jackson, feed dogs, get everyone tucked into bed and asleep. I started some tortellini, put Jonah down, let Jackson wear his moonboots to visit the garden for fresh basil. Made a quick pesto sauce. Jackson had a few nibbles, then when I wasn't looking I guess he took too big a bite and spit it back into the bowl. Had to scrape slobbery pesto off the top, Jonah started to fuss more fervently, drain pasta, mix with pesto, put food on coffee table and nurse a baby through dinner. Jack complained that he just wanted pesto sauce, no noodles. I tried to cut a noodle into pieces so he could take a little bite, and ended up dumping my plate over onto the floor where it shattered. Clean up, fussy baby, attention seeking preschooler...Settled back in. Got myself and the baby fed. Sliced up some garlic bagette for Jack and spread it with new pesto (dried basil this time around). We're out of milk, again.

Took Jonah up to change him, tuck him into his sleep sack, and put him down. Saw dog throwup on the floor and chose to leave it for 10 minutes to put Jonah down. Jack stepped in it 5 minutes later, so I had to pull Jonah off the breast and leave him fussing, carry Jack to the tub where he refused to get in (I sprayed milk all over the place on the way), ran water in tub, cleaned up dog vomit, washed Jack's feet and hands and dried him off, came back to finish feeding Jonah and get him to sleep, Jackson went back downstairs to finish eating. When I came back down, Jack said he was hungry and cold and I noticed his rapidly blinking sleepy eyes. So I got him a glass of milk, carried him up to bed, and rolled him up into his fuzzy blanket. I brought him his stool so he could put his 1/2 full and then empty milk glass on it. Then I laid down with him and watched his eyes blink closed.

I'm having a little bit of "me time" now. Quick blog post, load the dishwasher, put a couple of work hours in to make up for time I missed earlier in the week. Today was a pretty good day. Goodnight.

Glen Jackson Fox: Part 1

2010-07-13T23:02:00.001-04:00

For those who haven't heard, my grandfather passed away last Wednesday, July 7th, 2010, after a lengthy illness. It's been a difficult time for all of the family, and I won't be able to attend the funeral he's requested us to forgo. I've decided to write a multi-part series about him and our relationship. It's mostly for myself and my family, but I imagine the experience between a young woman of my generation and an old man of his is much the same thing for other families, and perhaps everyone else will like the stories too.

Background facts as they were recorded in my 3rd grade genealogy workbook (my relatives are free to correct any errors or omissions): Glen Jackson Fox was born November 17, 1932 at his Aunt Rose's home. His parents were Owen Fox and Elva Jackson Fox. He learned to swim by being thrown in the Ogden River. He didn't complete his formal education, and was married to my grandmother, Arabella “Arabell” Campbell on August 28, 1950. They were married in Elko, Nevada, in what I have always assumed was an elopement. My grandfather worked for the Union Pacific Railroad from the time he was 17 until his retirement. He also had other jobs including working as a carpenter “He worked for Big D back when it was just me and Big D” he told me once. (Big D is a major construction presence in Utah.) My grandparents had four daughters and a son: Christine (my mom), Susan, Linda, Lori, and Frank. They purchased a home in a new development 3309 Adams Avenue in Ogden where my grandmother still lives. They divorced when my mother was 16 and Frank was 2. Shortly after that, he married Mildred “Mickey” and they lived in a condo at 4539 S 1800 W in Roy, Utah until his death.

My grandpa always lived life to the fullest. At some point when my mom was a teenager, he had a speedboat and would take them water skiing. He also took them snow skiing. He once had an airplane, which he crashed on his last flight after selling it. He traveled frequently, summering in Utah and wintering in Yuma, Arizona after his retirement. He took trips to visit family around the country including his sister, Jean in California, Frank in North Carolina, me in Connecticut, and also trips overseas to Paris and Ireland.

When I was very young, we visited my grandfather on Father's Day, his birthday, Christmas Eve, and a few times during the summer to swim. At these visits, the family hung out mostly in the basement family room. My grandfather sat in his chair smoking long brown cigarettes, and the kids paid little attention to him. There were great toys in the basement: a sit and spin, one of those wheels on a stick for doing stomach exercises (we used to hold onto it and wheel around the room like one of those flying monkeys in the Wizard of Oz); carpeted stairs that we slid down in a game called "bumpity bump"; there was a nutcracker with a mallet and a big wooden box shaped like an almond that held decks of cards (solitaire, war, or go fish were played on every visit); and they had a ping pong table that was replaced with a pool table when I was around 10. After the arrival of the pool table, we spent more time shooting pool and less time playing cards. In the summer we would visit to use the pool at the condo. I don't remember whether my grandpa came to the pool with us or not. Sometimes Mickey came along and sometimes we would just stop at the house to get the key to the pool and go swimming with just my mom or my aunts and uncles. I usually wore water wings and mostly hung out in what might have been a hot tub, but I always considered it a kiddie pool because it was shallow with a step running along all four walls. It was also much warmer than the main pool. The summer before second grade, my uncle taught me to do backflips from the side of the pool. It was a great trick and I enjoyed it for a few months, until I learned fear. (I under rotated my flip one trip to Ben Lomond Pool with friends and hit my head on the edge of the pool. The one legged life guard pulled me out of the water, then hopped me all the way around the pool to the office where he put some bandages on my head. My mom took me to the hospital for stitches—I received 8 so the scar on my forehead would be minimal. The hospital staff gave me some balloons for being so brave and forbade me to swim for a week, a real drag since I left for vacation in California the next day.)

One Christmas Eve, my grandpa gave my brother and I electronic fireman hats, complete with sirens. These were one of the coolest toys I ever remember receiving. Someone, Grandpa I guess, asked Michael “Are you going to be a Lover or a Fireman when you grow up?”. We wore the hats on the drive home in the station wagon, and I never saw them again. (I can't really blame my parents for that, I want to disappear lots of Jackson's toys.)

At some point in my childhood, my grandfather gave up smoking. He said nothing about it, and my mom and aunts whispered that there must've been a medical reason but no one knew what it was. He seemed to just go cold turkey--smoking at his birthday, but not that Christmas Eve. Mickey told me much later that he had been to see either an accupuncturist or a hypnotist to stop. Around that time, there was also a fight between my father and grandfather at the Christmas Eve party. I don't know what they argued about, but we left in a big hurry. I remember loading up into the station wagon in the dark. I think we visited less often after that, but we still made it out for the 3 holidays.

My parents separated the summer after my 16th birthday. As we settled into our new routines, my mom told me that I needed to go and visit my grandpa. She said that if I visited him, he would take care of me. So I visited, he took care of me, and that's how we began to have more of a relationship. My grandpa who wasn't much for sharing his feelings said a few times something to the effect that he was making up for the kind of relationship I had with my father and the relationship he'd had with my mother when she was younger. After that, he started calling me “Daughter” more often than he called me “Granddaughter”.

Dinosaur State Park

2010-07-12T22:17:00.002-04:00

I've been trying to take the boys on outings Saturday and Sunday mornings. It's good for all of us to get out, plus poor Jason has been working overnights on the weekends, and if we're gone, a.) he has half a chance to catch up on sleep and b.) I don't get annoyed trying to be quiet until 3 in the afternoon. A few weeks ago, we went to the Dinosaur Park in Rocky Hill, CT. This dino park is all about tracks, not bones. They were excavating to build some state building, and the backhoe driver lifted a layer of rocks to reveal the tracks. He knew what they were, notified the authorities, and within 6 months it was declared a state park.

I've been hearing friends say that they went there and had a good time. So far, no one has really described their visit. I'll try to do that here. We took the stroller, with attached Valco stroller board for Jackson to ride on. This was fortuitous. You enter through the gift shop, and the museum is arranged as a loop around the tracks, which are enclosed in a giant auditorium like building with a dino-statue and dino-mural behind. The lights are dim, and playing very loudly is a soundtrack to dino-noises. Jackson was notably frightened and had a death grip on the stroller handles. It's good that he was riding on the stroller board, because I don't believe his feet would've been able to carry him.

Shortly after we entered the museum, they started a claymation dino-cartoon. The cashier said it was geared toward little ones, so I brought Jackson to see it with him protesting the whole time (I think he was pretty anxious to get out of there!) I told Jackson we could leave if he hated the movie after it started. He refused to get off of the stroller board, but he had to turn and look over his shoulder to see the movie, and by the end, he had stepped off the board to turn around and sit on it. I'm not sure he ever broke contact with the stroller. The movie itself was unexpected. It was premised on the idea of a book report presentation at school, with some scenes written on a chalk board. Here are a couple of pictures from it, that I took as a visual aid to describe the surrealness of the whole adventure.

Seeing the movie broke the ice a little with Jackson, he didn't leave the stroller, but he was a little more excited to see the rest of the small museum. We did walk quickly along the last stretch—a bridge over the tracks that gets pretty close to the dino-statue. You can see it in the picture (see the man in silhouette in front of the mural).

The park has extensive trails you can walk on. We didn't because the stroller isn't for offroading, and it was also a really hot day. You can make casts of some of the tracks if you bring your own 5 gallon bucket, ¼ cup of vegetable oil, and 10 pounds of plaster. (Apparently they can't sell a kit for this in the gift shop?!) Or you can buy a little bag of dirt with gemstone fragments and/or fossils and sluice for treasures. We went for this. Jackson would sluice all day if I let him. His technique is to load the trays up with mud, run it under the fountain, and then mound even more dirt on it for the next round. I rescued the arrow head and shiny rocks from the sluice, Jack couldn't care less about the treasure, he's all about the dirt and water.

Jonah slept through the whole trip.

More baby laughter

2010-07-11T15:42:00.000-04:00

So we found out Jonah was indeed ticklish the other day.

Sand Box Bullies

2010-06-06T22:56:00.001-04:00

Jackson 7.5 weeks

Jonah 8 weeks

Today

2010-06-05T23:02:00.000-04:00

Accomplished today:
dishes
breakfast lunch and dinner-all eaten by Jack
put Jonah "down" for his naps
homemade chocolate syrup 1/2 gallon
mocha frappacino
planted: 21 tomatoes, 2 eggplants, 31 peppers, basil seeds.
Sewed 9 pair of nursing pads
bathed 1.5 kids (Jason did the other 1/2)
unclogged 1 tub, reassembled, and cleaned
snuggled with husband
watched Toy Story 3 times
published 1 pic to facebook
posted to blog
2 loads of laundry

maybe I've finally figured this 2 kid thing out. More likely got incredibly lucky!

Happy 2 month day, Jonah. Thank you for being so charming and such a cooperative sleeper.

Fishing Part Deux

2010-05-05T23:15:00.000-04:00

After another afternoon casting about the backyard, Jackson had pretty well ~~mastered~~ accomplished the necessary steps, and Jason took him to the pond. Here are the pictures of the day. I wasn't there, so I can't comment much.

Jason loaded Jackson's line up with some heavy fish lures. No hooks or sinkers in the interest of safety. His first day out on the water, Jackson could've sunk a hook into anything including his cheek. Turns out there wasn't much need to worry. The 2 practice days of casting in the yard were sufficient, and Jack was like an old pro.

Fish on! Jack didn't have a hook, so Jason really caught this one, but Jack did help real him in. It's a nice big Northern Pike for his first fish. Nice Job!

I had to add in this picture. It's the first time Jackson held Jonah. He had gotten bored of casting the line in the yard, and wanted to watch me. I was sitting in the canoe with Jonah, so Jackson offered to hold Jonah while I fished. By the time Jason got there with the camera, he had changed his mind, but we managed to get a shot. And yes, we noted the irony of doing two water activities, fishing and canoeing, in the dry yard.

Happy One Month Day, Jonah

2010-05-05T22:40:00.003-04:00

Today is Jonah's One Month Day. Jonah celebrated by pooping through 3 outfits in between naps. The rest of us celebrated by grilling. The rest of the world celebrated with fajitas and tequila, it is Cinco de Mayo after all. The Earth celebrated by sending out the first of the season's fireflies.

I should've put my little boy on the scale yesterday when I had a chance to see just how much he's grown. Since I didn't, I just have the stats from last week. 9 lb 10 oz (Look how chubby he is already! That's up almost 2 lbs from birth) and 22 inches. Up a fabulous 2 3/4 inches (a reminder that the stretch the baby on a piece of paper method is very inaccurate).

Jonah is for the most part an easy baby. I take him to mom's group, and the other mothers of newborns marvel at how easy going he is. He sleeps for 3 hour stretches, is willing to sleep in his bed. Cries only to eat or burp. When he's awake, the eating and burping are constant--every 20-30 minutes for 2-3 hours in the morning and evening. This makes it difficult to get the rest of the household fed and dressed. Fortunately Jackson has been a good sport about it. At first he was very nervous about the crying and would get upset himself. Now he's taking it in stride. If I'm right there, he will ask "Mom, why is Jonah crying?" and if I've stepped away, he comes to find me and tell me "Mom, Jonah is crying!"

In some ways, he is also a difficult baby. The need to eat so frequently am and pm is hard to comply with. Jonah has also decided not to take artificial nipples--no pacifier, and no bottle. I'm somewhat envious of the people I know with toddlers who won't give up the binky, it sure would be nice to let the little guy suck himself to sleep. I don't know what he's going to do in 4 weeks when I have to go back to work. I got a couple of different types of bottles to try, and hopefully he'll accept one of them and not starve to death.

This picture is totally staged. Jack was coerced into letting Jonah lean against him, and coached into putting his arm around him and holding his head up. Jack is actually laughing at Sponge Bob on TV. It turned out to be a great picture, though.

Happy One Month Day, Little Jonah.

gDiapers: a review

2010-05-01T23:12:00.000-04:00

We acquired a set of gDiapers, and today was the day to try them out. They bill themselves as a hybrid between cloth and disposables giving you the best of both worlds. They have cloth covers, and a nylon (waterproof) snap in piece that holds a cellulose based flushable liner (now available in reusable cloth). The idea is that you pull out the flushable liner, swish it in the toilet and flush, then wash the rest with your regular laundry. The liners are completely biodegradable, and they suggest composting wet ones instead of flushing. I wouldn't recommend that unless the compost is for flowers only, not for food.

In my test, the diapers worked well. I would say as effective as disposables. We had one minor leak out the leg, which might have been due to operator error since I intentionally put the diaper on backward (they velcro in back, and I thought it was inconvenient). There were some much juicier diaper changes later which didn't leak, and likely would have blown out the back with 'sposies.

The diapers look pretty comfy. The cloth is stretchy around the legs and waist. I don't think pooh could travel far up the back because of the nice waistband, even if it did try to escape. It velcros in back so baby fingers can't pull them off, but this isn't a problem until the baby becomes a toddler. The back velcro is somewhat awkward at first. The diaper in the photo is on backward quite by accident, but no leaks that time.

I also give the diapers points for cuteness.

I opted not to swish the liners since we have a septic system, so I just separated it into the trash. This is my complaint with the diapers. I think if I'm gonna go cloth, I should just do cloth and save myself the trouble of dismantling a gooey mess. I think the cloth inserts might make more sense for my application. Maybe I'll try putting a cloth doubler in instead of the disposable liner. If I do, I'll let you know how that goes.

If any of you are interested in trying the gdiapers yourself, I could pass them along. I have 7 covers, and 75 liners in size small (8-14 lbs).

Fishing part one

2010-04-24T08:50:00.002-04:00

Jackson has been enthralled with the idea of fishing. We play fish with a toy on a string. Jason got the birthday boy a real rod. Here they are learning to cast in the backyard. Next up, hitting the lakes and streams.

Jonah rolls over

2010-04-24T08:43:00.000-04:00

Baby Jonah is already trying to keep up with his big brother. I brought him home from the hospital, set him on the bed on his belly, turned my back, and he rolled over--twice. Jason saw him do it a week later on the couch. Last night, he was on a roll (ohh, sorry for the pun), but I managed to capture it on film. Here is my brand newbie 2 1/2 week old baby rolling from front to back:

It's a three step process.
Step 1 (optional): Get Really Mad
Step 2: Lift up giant head and fling it to one side.
Step 3: Allow giant head to pull rest of body over.

And lest you think my bed is sloped giving him some unfair advantage, he goes left!

Introducing Jonah Dale Dodge

2010-04-09T23:35:00.000-04:00

It's [finally] time to welcome Jonah Dale Dodge to the world. Born Monday, April 5, 2010 at 8:56 pm: 7lb 15oz and 19 3/4 inches long. He looks very much like baby Jackson, but with a twist of Daddy this time instead of Mom. Jonah has blue eyes and a surprising cap of silky dark brown hair.

We were, of course, thrilled from the first moment. And so far, things are just getting better. Jonah is not following in the footsteps of his big brother on many accounts. First, Note the size--less than 8 lbs (vs the 9lb 6oz of baby Jackson). Jonah caught on to the art of breastfeeding right away. He followed that trick up with the ability to sleep, in his own space, and on his back! Like his brother, he is a breathtakingly beautiful child with a matching disposition.

How is big brother Jackson doing? Pretty well. He is doing a good job of checking on Jonah, helping to get things for him, and shushing us to be quiet when Jonah is sleeping. Jackson is also very nervous about the baby. He doesn't want to sit by him, and I've only seen him touch him twice. Definitely no hugs or kisses yet. Jackson is also alarmed by the crying, he will ask why he cries, and if it goes on for more than a few seconds he retreats to another room.

Here I am just before heading out to the hospital.

Look at that yawn!

That's it for the picture posts. For those of you who are detail hungry, I'll get to the birth story soon.

Behave

2010-02-19T11:30:00.000-05:00

Quote of the day:

"Daddy, Behave!"

Followed by, "Mom, he isn't being have."

Catching up on the holidays--Halloween

2010-02-15T21:48:00.001-05:00

This Halloween, I thought I could just try to put Jackson in his dinosaur costume from last Halloween. Around mid-October, I was in Target with Nicole who was trying to show me an adorable chicken costume for wee ones. We didn't see the chicken costume, but Jackson spotted the Elmo. We weren't even out of the store before he was wearing it.

We had a great time trick or treating--Jackson was into it after the first house. He would walk slowly up the driveway, say Trick or Treat before the bell was rung or the door was opened, collect handful after handful of candy (on account of his amazing cuteness), then whisper "Ank you" after the door closed and he was 1/2 way down the walk. At the middle of the driveway, he would shout, "We need get some more candy!" and we'd walk to the next house.

Someone in the neighborhood stages a haunted house in their garage complete with a cardboard maze, scary music, ghouls and skeletons on pullies, and a strobe light. We went in with Jackson walking cheerfully. As we traversed the maze, Jack walked more and more slowly. Eventually he just stopped walking and we had to carry him the rest of the way out. Our hosts treated him at the end, and he declared it "not so bad" as we walked away.

Driving home, we all had a piece of chocolate from the pumpkin. Back inside, the pumpkin went on the counter and Jackson got out his stool to help himself to more candy. The pumpkin journeyed to higher and higher spots in the kitchen, eventually spending the night on top of the refrigerator. It eventually went on a high shelf in the pantry, with Jackson asking daily for his candy rations (2 pieces). The pumpkin was much heavier than it should've been for the 20 odd houses we hit (widely spaced country houses, and a still queasy feeling mother).

lemonade

2010-02-12T22:09:00.000-05:00

Just one example of what I'm up against with this almost three year old.

I was sitting by the fire, and Jackson was up his stool scanning the kitchen for something interesting. He'd already spent a few minutes "washing dishes" and slid the stool down a few feet for some other entertainment.

"Oh, a lemon!" He grabs out a lemon from the fruit basket (which has been there too long, and is rock hard on the outside, but fine inside) and heads my way chattering. "Mom, we can juice it with a (pause for the right word) thingy, then we can make a lemon pie! I will help you. I'm a good helper!"

Me, "We could, but its kinda late to be making a lemon pie."
"Why"
"It takes a long time to make a pie, and we need to head upstairs for story time."
"But I'm a good helper"

It's five after 8, and I have no desire to make a lemon pie. We made one a couple weeks ago, and Jackson helped, so I guess I brought this on myself. But seriously, how can I outright turn down such an enthusiastic offer of help? I suggested we make lemonade instead. That boy had the heel of a loaf of bread with butter and chocolate milk for dinner, he could use something from another food group to even things out a bit.

That suggestion was accepted enthusiastically. So I set to work sawing the lemon in half, picked up a fork and glass, and headed to the table for some help. We got the lemon juiced without spraying much around the kitchen. I scooped out the seeds, added water and sugar, and we had our lemonade.

Jackson had the first sip, and immediately blew bubbles through the straw. So I had to chastise him. A few minutes later, he blew bubbles again, then quickly apologized. I chastised him again--out came his sad lower lip, and he said, "but mom, I just trying to say sorry." So I backpedaled slightly, thanked him for apologizing, reminded him to be careful not to blow any more bubbles, and cheerfully shared the refreshing beverage.

Pregnancy without the Sugar Coating

2010-02-08T23:37:00.000-05:00

I'm taking some time out from documenting the exploits and amazingness of my boy to talk about the months spent getting that boy and the upcoming one.

Some of you have said how much you love being pregnant. I hope that's the case, but I'm skeptical. Someone I know who had a great deal of trouble conceiving apologized recently for complaining once about severe heartburn during her pregnancy. I see no need to apologize. I complain most days of my pregnancy. I acknowledge that I don't even think I have particularly terrible pregnancies--no bed rest, no preeclampsia, no diabetes. Why all the complaining? Well, I'll try to explain what its like. I'll begin somewhere near the beginning.

The first trimester. For me, it starts with anxiety. Anxiety about whether I'm pregnant, followed by the anxiety of whether I'll remain pregnant, and in the upcoming months whether my child will be healthy. Add illness to anxiety. Pregnant with Jackson, the morning sickness started right away, before I'd even taken the pregnancy test. I was exhausted and nauseous for 4 1/2 months. It was a weird morning sickness, I felt sick most of the time, but I was still functioning pretty well. I was working and productive at work. I was rowing twice a week. Sometimes I didn't feel like rowing or working, but I was still able to do it. While I felt sick a lot, I didn't vomit a lot. When I did it came without any warning. After a couple of partly successful attempts to pull over the car in the middle of my commute, I took to carrying gallon ziplock bags everywhere, just in case. After 4 1/2 months had passed, when I was no longer sick is when I realized just how sick I had been.
This pregnancy, I made it to 5 weeks (counting the 2 bonus weeks before conception actually occurs) before getting ill. I started feeling sick the fifth week. I was nearing the end of a special assignment at work, and I told myself that I could make it through the last week (week 6), then take a couple days off, then suck it up and go back to work. I made it through week 5 at work. Saturday I stopped eating and didn't get off the couch. I mostly stayed there until Wednesday, when I dragged myself to the doctor's office to lay on the couch in their waiting room and bawl. They took me back in and weighed me, then the NP waived my exam, sat me down at her desk, and wrote me a script for Zofran--a powerful antiemetic approved for use in Chemotherapy patients, with a price tag to match (retail $400/week). I started taking the recommended dosage, and eating little bits of food (Ramen noodles, pretzel sticks, jolly ranchers). I was still purging a few times a day and confined to the couch. My blood test came back fine, but showed I was dehydrated (Sorry, water induced vomiting). I lost 10 pounds in 3 weeks. The medication has constipation as a side effect, its not a mild side effect.

I scheduled an ultrasound and follow up visit for the next week. In the meantime, I busied myself with reading up on what could cause severe morning sickness, hyperemesis gravidarum. Three possible causes: 1-random occurance, 2-multiple fetuses, 3-molar pregnancy (nonviable, and increased risk of cancer). I was so sick that I was actually considering that last option might be the best one (and yes, I do know how drastic a thought that is). I saw it as an opportunity to start over.

The ultrasound showed a little squiggly line wriggling around in my belly, just 1. I love ultrasound, anxiety levels decreased a little bit after that. The doctor said I could up the Zofran dose in the am. So I did, going back to the original dose in the afternoon, and vomiting in the parking lot at 4:30 everyday until I upped the dose in the afternoon too. After that I still vomited every day, but at random times. I forced myself into work most days, but the walk from the parking lot and up the stairs exhausted all of my energy stores, I spent at least half of everyday trying to talk myself out of being sick. Let's just say my productivity was pretty low for the next couple of months at work and even lower at home. After returning from work, I retook my residency on the couch, getting up to make Ramen and change diapers. Jackson saw my repose as an opportunity to jump on me and snuggle. Snuggling = good, Jumping = not so much. No amount of telling him to be careful about the baby in my belly could deter the jumping. Jason and Jackson took many trips to the store attempting to buy me food to make me feel better, they struck out every time. I think I was also developing some prenatal depression to go along with my sickness, hard not to when I was that miserable. I got a healthy checkup at 12 weeks. But I didn't bother to make phone calls and spread the good news far and wide that I was expecting. I didn't feel much joy in it.

This brings me to the second trimester. The one where pregnant ladies are supposed to feel great, have tons of energy, nest, and vacation. Pregnant with Jackson, I spent half of the second trimester still sick and the rest of it feeling OK, but not particularly energetic. This time, I felt much much better than I did the first trimester! There's no overstating how much better I felt! I definitely had more energy than in the first trimester, I started doing some of the things that had been making me crazy for months and I was off the couch. At 20 weeks I went in for the anatomical ultrasound. There was my little baby, with all the expected parts in all the expected places, and in 3D. The baby didn't want to show its wares, but eventually after several attempts, we were able to get a brief glimpse between the legs, and it was declared another boy. We spent a long time in the ultrasound room. First because they hadn't told me to drink before coming, so they made me drink when I got there and kept taking pictures until my bladder filled up so they could check the placenta. It went from empty to near bursting, so I was told to "pee just a little" I laughed at the technician, managed to pee a little more than I intended too, came back in, and was told my bladder was still too full and to "pee just a little more", which was still not enough. So I had to finish peeing, drink just a little, and come back to ultrasound after my exam. Having this ultrasound does wonders for reducing anxiety. Its an opportunity to see all of the external features of the baby and see that its all there, the major organs are also checked and receive a seal of good health, and it makes the baby much more real to see it on the screen. I start to think of it more as a person and less something torturing me from the inside out after the ultrasound. My enthusiasm for the pending child was renewed.

I should also mention the question of gender here. After announcing a pregnancy and before the gender is confirmed is a time full of speculation. Other than a tiny little human, what will it be? People don't hesitate to comment on this one. If you already have 1 or more children, I think the tendency is to guess that it will be the other gender. So I heard many people comment on how it was surely a girl. That's what the Chinese calendar predicted for me. That's what I wanted (not what I expected, however). Since I was so terribly sick this time, it just had to be a girl! FYI, don't make these comments to your pregnant friends, particularly if they're predisposed to having one gender over the other. Feel free to say, "I hope its (whatever they might want to hear)" but don't make outright predictions.

What else happens during trimester two? Well for me, the baby starts to get moving around month 5. My babies are gymnasts. They pummel me from the inside out all day and all night. This time, I've been waking up in the wee hours of the night and staying awake for the hour or two it takes to complete my internal massage. Feeling the baby move is pretty amazing. It's fascinating, it's reassuring, and it's also very distracting. I've been trying to describe the sensation, and I think its like some combination of all of these things, yet none of them. It's like hitting your funny bone, having a muscle spasm, going to the fish farm and getting a full bucket of trout swimming around anxiously then putting your hand in that bucket, having a knot in your muscle that you can push on and feel it move a few millimeters from side to side, and the hiccups. Physically, its like all of those things and none of them. Emotionally its something else. There are also little games to be played with a fetus, push on the belly and see if the baby will kick back or shine a bright light at it.

The second trimester also brings a bout of sciatica cursing down my left back and into my thigh. I experience it as an affliction of inertia. After I've been sitting, its difficult to bring myself upright or to walk. So, I get up and spend the next 50 feet hunched over. It was getting so bad that at 5 1/2 months, I was on the brink of not being able to hold myself upright and fearing that I'd collapse, I got a referral to a physical therapist, which I planned to visit at the new year.

Over the holidays (5 3/4 months) my baby decided to move up from my pelvis to my belly. I traded in the sciatica (relief) for heartburn, back pain, and reduced lung capacity. I have a weekly meeting or 3 in another building, its about a mile walk to get there (can be done indoors in the winter) and is referred to as "company sponsored exercise. I made the walk the first week back from Christmas and barely made it there, an hour later, I had to make the return trip. I came home that night freaking out about how I couldn't do the simplest tasks anymore, my muscles must've atrophied over the holidays (irrational since I was busy painting Jack's room and moving furniture), and determined to find some way to regain some semblance of endurance. I settled on the elliptical trainer that takes up space, collects dust, and had until the day before been destined for a posting on Craig's List. I stepped on it and the pedals refused to budge. Then I tore the house apart looking for the giant screwdriver needed to disassemble it, finally found it, and used my last breaths to take it apart, expecting to find a matchbox car wedged in the machine. The magnetic resistance was stuck firmly on the flywheel. I pried it off, and it immediately stuck itself firmly in place. I decided it needed new batteries, exhausted myself further putting it back together so that little fingers wouldn't hurt themselves the next morning. The next day, I got new batteries, putting them in noticed that the existing batteries were installed upside down. Adjusted the existing batteries and it still didn't work. Put in the new batteries and it still didn't work. Exhausted myself taking it apart again, prying the magnet off the drive, still not working. Finally I tried adjusting the resistance, I set it to very high, then back to a low setting. That finally worked. More exhaustion putting the machine back together. It's fixed now.

Over the next couple of weeks, I could really feel my belly stretching (and still can). First the baby moved up, then he set his sights on moving outward. Two weeks later, people started coming up to me with congratulations. Apparently, I went from looking normal to looking incredibly pregnant overnight. I guess first losing and then regaining 10 pounds had been a net zero effect. I hadn't felt that way. It seemed to me that the baby was filling up my pelvis and squishing all the fat outward so that I just looked a bit chubbier. Once the baby moved up and out, that look was replaced by a classic pregnancy enormous pot belly. (Pondering here, why is it that there's no such thing as "a little bit pregnant" but there is a such thing as "Very Pregnant!") Now that the baby has moved out, I'm in some danger of toppling over, but my lung capacity has improved, I can make the mile walk (still feeling a bit winded) and the elliptical training is back to collecting dust.

Cocoa butter is touted as the best remedy for stretch marks. There are 2 options in the cocoa butter market. A lotion that upon closer inspection contains only trace amounts of cocoa butter, or something that comes in a tub and has a high percent of cocoa butter. I have the stuff in the tub, 2 versions of it, one is 100% cocoa butter. Attention cosmetic industry, the tub is not an ideal container for cocoa butter. Cocoa butter is a rock at room temperature, there is no convenient way to remove it from the tub. Ideally, it would come in a giant chapstick tube so that it could be screwed upward, and applied to warm skin where it would melt on the surface. Instead I have a melon baller that I use to scrape cocoa butter shavings out of the tub, rub them between my hands to melt, then smear on my belly. Cocoa butter flakes spill onto the floor. I smell like a giant Hershey bar.

Coming into the third trimester, I am free of diabetes (hurray!) my blood pressure is its usual low self (hurray!) and I have the following complaints: I'm very tired. There's no longer room on my lap for my toddler. I have to bend my legs to the side to put on pants or shoes because my belly is in the way of bring my knee straight upward. It's a challenge to wipe my bum. I think my ankles are starting to swell. If I'm asked any kind of a direct question, I will cry. There are little feet hooked under my ribs forcing me to keep my back straight under penalty of pain. The constant kicking is less cute and sometimes quite painful, and my hips hurt. My hips hurt so badly I'd almost rather have the sciatica back. Yesterday I spend a few hours on my feet cleaning and cooking, by the end of the night I could barely walk. Jackson had trouble going to sleep, and I had to climb over his bedroom gate several times to reassure him. Climbing over the gate was very difficult and painful. Getting up in the middle of the night for a bathroom break was painful such that I was hunched over and clinging to the walls to make my way there. I was all set to call in sick to work. This morning though, my hips had returned to their baseline pain level, so I pulled myself out of bed. I think I might have arthritis, I could really use some anti-inflammatory ibuprofen, oh yeah, that's banned. Guess I'll suffer. My doctor says I could benefit from some cat-cow exercises. I think those are for my back, not my hips. I think my back is OK, mostly.

Other temporary complaints: one day last week, the baby wedged himself just above my right hipbone. I woke at 2 am with terrible pain in that area. Getting ready for work, the pain worsened and wrapped around my back. I was ready to go back to bed, but had suppliers to visit with at work, so I forced myself to go in. I spent the first half hour of our meeting tracking down my doctor's phone number (Why isn't it programmed into my phone?!) then planned to sneak out to call. I didn't call, and the pain subsided by noon. I've also had a couple of episodes of severe cramping followed by diarrhea. The first time, I didn't know what it was, blamed it on a bad reaction to Chinese takeout (now off the menu) and suffered through it. The second time, I read the book, which said it could be a sign of preterm labor and to call the doctor. I read the book about an hour into the pain, then I sat in bad hoping it would dissipate while I watched Jason attempt to pack a bag for the hospital. He put in Jackson pajamas. Jackson was already asleep in pajamas. I told him to pack fuzzy pants, socks, and nursing tanks for me. I don't know what if anything else went in the bag. The pain subsided 1/2 an hour later and I didn't call the doctor. The bag is now in the closet, without my fuzzy pants. When I saw the doctor, she didn't put me on any kind of rest (thankfully). She suggested some minor behavior modifications, which I've gladly complied with.

Next up trimester number 3. The longest home stretch ever. I'm expecting a magification of my second trimester complaints. That's what I had before. More heartburn, more difficulty putting on shoes (Plug for the giant Ikea shoehorn here), more waddling, more complaints about ill fitting maternity clothing (by the end I'll be lucky to fit into anything). Maybe some new complaints.

Pregnant with Jackson, I got kidney stones at 7 months. At first I thought it was a repeat of the sciatica. I went to work because I was saving up my sickdays for postpartem. I spent an hour splayed out on a conference room table hoping the pain would subside. It didn't. I had a Dr. appt that afternoon, and went there in excruciating pain. They kept me waiting, checked on the baby, then sent me to the hospital. The hospital was very nice, they took me in right away, stuck me on a baby monitor, then made me lie there in excruciating pain for my Dr to show up 3 hours later (around 9pm). I was then allowed to have pain medication and given a shot of morphine, it didn't help at all. I waited a few hours for the morphine to be metabolized, and was given a Demerol drip, which was a miracle. At some point it was decided that it was probably kidney stones and an ultrasound was ordered to confirm it. Small hospitals don't keep an extensive staff of renal radiology technicians on hand after hours, so it was 11:30 before I had the ultrasound, which showed a couple of swollen areas on my kidney and a blocked ureter. I spent the night and most of the next day at the hospital drinking water and straining my urine. They let me go home with a strainer and a script of I think Percocet, which did work. A few days later I passed a couple of stones. This pregnancy, I'm drinking more water and attempting to sleep more on my right side.

Kidney stones are often described as comparable to childbirth. Since I experienced both within a matter of months, I feel I'm qualified to comment. The kidney stones pain was comparable to labor contractions. The pain was of a similar nature, location, and intensity. The pain of kidney stones is constant and relentless, so in one way, its worse than contractions, which are very intense but intermittent. But contractions lead to active labor and the pain of pushing something the size of a bowling ball through the birth canal is much much worse than the pain of contractions or kidney stones. There is no comparison!

The last month of my pregnancy with Jackson, my body started to swell--and swell. I felt like Violet Beauregarde, a giant blueberry except still flesh colored. I gained a lot of weight the last month, all of it water. At every appointment, my blood pressure was up. It peaked at something like 130/80, nothing to really worry about, but much higher than my baseline 105/60.

The second to last thing about pregnancy is the waiting. I went to the Dr weekly and was told that I was making no progress, no dilation, no visible effacement, nothing. I was also told my baby was gigantic, something my Dr likes to warn against. She isn't in favor of 10 lb babies, my first was 1/2 pound shy of that mark. I tried everything the old wives suggested to bring on labor: vigorous walking, pineapple, you name it, I tried it. Unfortunately, it was all things I'd been doing all along, so I guess I'd been desensitized to the things that precipitate labor. I scheduled an induction for a week after I was due. The day before, I spend 17 hours in labor (not going to elaborate now, but its the last and worst thing I could complain about pregnancy) and delivered a very healthy and mildly post mature looking boy.

That little boy makes me happy everyday. My love for him has expanded my own capacity for loving humanity and forgiving faults in others. Despite my complaining, pregnancy was a small price to pay in exchange for such a perfect child. Despite the discomfort I feel now, I'm looking forward to the moments immediately following the birth of this new child and the many moments after that.

I think we are on the right track...

2010-02-05T01:49:00.000-05:00

Jason here. I have to report an incident that makes me think we are headed the right direction with this kid. After spending some time at work with me and my coworkers, we came home and I decided to sand the driveway to help the snow melt. Jack, of course, went to work shoveling the snow into little piles on the driveway. When he saw me using the spreader, he insisted on helping. In the course of our travels up and down the driveway, I ran over one of his piles of snow. Jack started to sigh like he was bummed out. The following actually brought tears to my eyes:

"What's wrong Jack?
You ran over my snow castle Dad.
I'm sorry Jack. I didn't mean to.
That's ok. It was an accident. You didn't mean to. I forgive you. Ya know, sometimes, these things just happen. We just need to fix it.

My little boy has been paying attention to some of the finer educational programming apparently. I think he is well on his way to being a good person. I have never been so proud of him. Love ya, Jack!

Questions about the baby.

2010-02-01T19:33:00.001-05:00

For the last few months, Jackson has been patting my belly and asking questions about the baby. Questions like, "You got a baby in you belly?" "Why is it so big?" "When is the baby goin come out?" "Is it a brother or a sisser?...No, it a sisser." Sometimes he pats up a little bit high, so I explained how those are going to make milk for the baby. Now, sometimes he pats up a little high and says "And these will make milk for the baby to eat?"

This morning, we had the following exchange:

"Does your baby cry?"

"No" Jackson looks at me incredulously. Guess someone told him that all babies cry.

"Well, maybe. But we can't hear him through my belly." Incredulous look continues.

I thought for a moment about how to explain it to him. Telling him my belly was full of water, not air and the baby wouldn't breathe until he was born seemed like it would be a little bit much to comprehend. Ditto on explaining wave theory.

So, I went with: "Sound makes a vibration that travels through the air. You can't hear the baby if he tries to cry through my belly because the sound can't get out. See how you can hear me when I talk like this" then grabbing a big wad of fuzzy blanket and putting it in front of my face, "But if I put the blanket over my mouth, you can't hear me anymore?"

Then Jackson grabbed a little handful of blanket, put it in front of his mouth so the corners of his mouth were still free, and said "mah mah mah.mah mah".

He grabbed another tiny handful of blanket, put it barely in front of his lips, and said "I'm thinking we need some breakfast." Then we went downstairs to the kitchen.

Please Excuse Me.

2010-01-28T22:43:00.000-05:00

I was sitting on the bamboo mat in front of the fire. Jackson decided he would like to roll the mat up. He rolled it up until he bumped into me, then said, "Do you mind?" I ignored him, and he repeated, "Mommy, Do you mind!?" I suggested he might want to substitute either the phrase "Excuse me, please" or "Move, please". So he did and I moved.
I hold Jason fully responsible.

The Grinch

2010-01-28T22:40:00.001-05:00

So, we're now 6 weeks into "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" repeated nightly. Good thing I like the story, too. At the beginning of the adventure, I would sing "Da Who Dory" when the Who's sang. Jackson complained, "I don't like Da Who!" I asked what he'd prefer, and he settled on Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. So after teasing him with a little Da Who, I'd finish with Twinkle Twinkle.

Two weeks into this routine, Jackson started filling in his favorite phrases. First with "He got an awful idea!" now with more feeling, "The Grinch got a won-ful, AWE-FULL idea!" He likes to interject with other phrases too "like coo of a dove" "his heart was two sizes too small" and he's so proud every time. Last night, he went through the whole segment about the Who's feasting while I returned from a trip to the bathroom. Jason tells me he sometimes quotes Grinch phrases to him during the day. And after watching the movie (classic Chuck Jones with Boris Karloff version, of course) he insists that the Who's sing only Da Who and nothing but Da Who.

I've tried to switch over to other books, which results in my reading extra books. For now, we're sticking with the Grinch.

New Blog

2010-01-19T23:33:00.004-05:00

Apparently I don't have enough going in my life (yeah, right), so I have launched a new blog (link is from today's post's title). This one for crafts. So far, its populated with elements from Jack's new room. The latest is shown here. It didn't stay on the wall long, Jackson has dubbed it "mine stackers" and had fun stacking and sorting them, then sleeping and drooling on them. Maybe they can stay on the wall tomorrow.

Anyway, since I only have time for a limited number of projects, I'm seeking others to help populate the blog and share their talents. If you want to play, leave a comment with your google account signed in. If your profile is public, it will give me your username and I can send out an invite.

http://makeitcrafts.blogspot.com/

Here Be Dragons

2010-01-11T21:53:00.001-05:00

Jackson apparently had a nightmare last night. He dreamed that dragons came out of my [pregnant] belly and grabbed him. Jason slept with him most of the night. He called me at 6am complaining of the cold and told me that 'Daddy found the dragon and the mouse' before he dropped back off to sleep.

When I got home today, he told me some stuff about dragons and about how they aren't real. But at bedtime, he was distraught about the idea of sleeping in his new room. He insisted the light stay on and I stay with him. Fortunately he was exhausted and blinky and went to sleep easily. I'm afraid tomorrow won't be so easy.

Pileated Woodpecker

2010-01-02T21:38:00.004-05:00

The morning after Christmas was misty. I was downstairs with Jackson, and noticed some larger than usual activity in the front trees. It was a pileated woodpecker! I was thrilled to see this spectacular bird just 50 feet from my front window. She stuck around for about 1/2 and hour, and worked over this tree plus a few others. From the damage done to the trees, I think she must be visiting us frequently.
The only other time I've seen her, or her kin around was shortly after we moved in. It was another misty morning, and Jason woke me up about 5 am to look through the haze in the backyard. That bird didn't stay long, and in the dark and fog, we didn't get a very good look. I've had my eye on the tree ever since hoping for another glimpse, but the tree seems to have been taking over by redbellied woodpeckers.
Pileated woodpeckers have an extensive Northern range, but they prefer old growth trees. Our forest is maybe 50 years old and was logged 20 years ago, so the trees are young and small.

Jack's New Room (making space for baby 2)

2010-01-02T21:04:00.004-05:00

This is Jackson's new room--the room formerly known as Sheree's office. My belongings are now displaced, scattered, and piled about the house. We are working on other adjustments to make the space we have more functional.

For now, Jack is excited to be in his new room. He's bounced on the new bed, which is super fun. He and I share the same phobia of his falling out of it since its at least a foot taller than his old bed. We brought one of his stools up so he could climb up and down more easily.

Playing with "laser" in new robot room.

Oops, I left the camera within child's reach. He likes taking pictures of the floor. This one has blurry feet--bonus!

Closing Remarks

2009-12-26T07:54:00.003-05:00

I'm sure you're all dying to see Christmas pictures. I have every intention of posted them promptly. For now, please accept Jackson's closing remarks from Christmas Day. This is after Jackson's was put to bed. He was at the gate to his room, calling for more attention.

Mom!
Mom!
Mommy!
Jason!
Jason!
Mommy!
Jason!

(Jason and I are down the hall, cracking up! Jason, "He's 2 1/2 and already I'm getting the first name treatment.")

What is that laughing about?!
RIGHT NOW!

A few days ago, I'd come across something annoying that Jason had done. Can't recall what now. Anyway, I mumbled, "Grrr, Jason". Jack heard me and asked who Jason was. So I explained how Daddy's other name is Jason, and Mommy's other name is Sheree. He gave me a funny look. Later he tried telling me that his other name was Jason. A few days later, he checked with his Daddy and was told that indeed, his Daddy did have another name, which was Jason. Guess he decided to try it out last night.

Powder

2009-12-20T19:34:00.005-05:00

It snowed. It's the kind of snow that I haven't seen in New England yet--light and powdery and deep. Jackson was so excited to go outside. I made him wait until after breakfast, then get bundled up. The snow was hip deep on poor Jackson. I had to pick him up and put him down in new places because walking was out of the question for him. He had fun shoveling [snow back onto the paths that were cleaned off]. See Jason in the background, wearing his new full body hunting suit? I took a We took a pass around the yard on his sled. Jackson had some nibbles. Unfortunately, making a snowman was out of the question in this powder. I'm sure the next snowfall will be damp.

Here's a picture of Ming, the Chinese soldier who protects our home. He scares the bajeebees out of anyone who stops by after dark, including the residents. This storm turned him into a gnome.

After playing and digging out, we came back inside to get warm by the fire and enjoy hot chocolate (pictures courtesy of the last snow storm).

Jackson's Drawing

2009-12-20T19:25:00.005-05:00

This is Jackson's latest drawing. Well, he's actually made 4 since, but this is the one I photographed and have really taken to. Sure, its kids scribbling, but he used so many elements in one drawing. First the orange with solid patches of color placed randomly in both horizontal and vertical directions. Then more of that with pink. In turquoise, circles--big ones made with the edge of the crayon and small ones made with the tip. Plus a smattering of dots small lines, etc.
Nice job, Jack!

This day is off to an exceptionally nice start

2009-12-12T09:27:00.004-05:00

This morning, Jackson slept until 8:30! I'm sure this was a result of 2 acts of leniency on my part. First, I let him stay up an extra couple of hours. But we were making mini cheesecakes, and it was only fair to let him enjoy his handiwork. Second and probably more influentially, I let him sleep with me the last half of the night. He's teething, and unless I drug him at bedtime (we're out of baby motrin) he wakes up screaming, "Mommy-I need you!". So at 4 am, on the second round of screaming, I tucked him back in bed, but left his gate open and told him he could come sleep with me if he wanted. He was in my bed before I returned from the bathroom. He does sleep more soundly with another person. I had to get up at 8 after the hunters' gunshots frightened my dog who nosed me out of bed. Jackson only lasted another 30 minutes on his own.
We came downstairs, and Jackson is snuggling in his fuzzy blanket and eating french toast.
Every 10 minutes or so, he said "Mom, you know...I bery lucky." So I say, "You are very lucky. I'm very lucky too." Then he might say, "We both bery lucky." I find these words to be a profound statement of affection from my boy. He came to them on his own, and I imagine they make more sense than repeating "I love you's". I'll take them. I'll also take the "Oh, mom-mom" I used to get with my hugs, but the frequency of those has declined since his vocabulary has increased.

I, Robot

2009-12-09T20:07:00.005-05:00

Jackson insists on being called "Jack". If we say, "Monkey" or "Sunshine" or "Silly-head" he counters with "I not, I just Jack!" Jason tends to follow with a W&G "Just Jack" gesture (someday he'll be sorry.)
Sometimes, Jackson pretends to be a puppy, crawls and woof's. After getting a nice scratch behind the ears, he reverts to "Just Jack".
Today, he's told me a couple of times that he is a robot. (Shout out to Elliot!) He follows the statement with some monotone robot speech "I-am-a-ro-bot". At bedtime, he became a robot, and when I asked if he would wear his pants, he said "I-sorry. I-a-ro-bot. No-pants. I-need-my-blank-et."
So, there it is. "I-ro-bot" is the new universal excuse for being disagreeable. Frankly its a huge improvement over the whiny disagreeableness he picked up after getting hooked on PBS's Caillou.

Locked Out

2009-11-23T19:02:00.002-05:00

I stepped outside to let the dog in the gate. I don't think I even shut the door. Jackson shut it, then stood on tiptoe to turn the deadbolt. So there I was, standing outside in the dark talking to a 2 year old through the door and begging him to unlock it. He suggested I use my key. So I pointed to the hook by the door where the keys hung.
Jackson went to the kitchen to get the high chair he's using as a surrogate stool (his real stool was hidden.). He then started moving the pile of clutter away from the corner. I thought he'd determined it was in the way of getting the chair to the door. Nope, he was going to use the high chair to get my keys from the hook. Don't know how he planned to get them through the door.
I walked over below the deck to get the emergency keys out. Unfortunately, its too dark to dial in the combination. So, I was back to trying to coax Jackson into unlocking the door.
I finally convinced him to turn the lock. I think he tried to turn it further in the same direction that locked it. It took another 5 minutes for Jack to get the door unlocked.
Now I'm grateful to be back inside. Unfortunately, I no longer have time to run to the farmstand to get our turkey. Oh well.

Best Day Ever

2009-11-22T18:43:00.004-05:00

Weekend Visitors

2009-09-06T22:03:00.004-04:00

Nicole, Ben, and Carolyn came up this weekend. We went to the baby stores so Nicole could finish registering. Did I mention she's expecting a little girl in December? See details here: http://www.webbabyshower.com/nicole/

Our guests came bringing toys. A stuffed Plankton beanie baby from Ben, and a couple of books with juggling puppies from Carolyn. Both were hits.

This morning, I went upstairs and left Jack with Carolyn and Nicole. After I left, He said, "Where Mom?" After hearing that I had gone upstairs, he ran for the pantry. When Nicole and Carolyn got there, he was holding a bag of chips and scanning the shelves said, "Mom gone, find some candy!"

Jackson was all over Ben this weekend. He kept asking, "Where Ben", and had a complete meltdown when they left today. He wouldn't give them smoochies goodbye because he thought they would have to stay if he refused. :(

The meltdown signaled nap time. I took Jack for a drive around the neighborhood to get him started, then laid down with him. We slept 'til 8:30. Not so good for bed time, but it was a badly needed snooze.

This week

2009-08-23T18:58:00.006-04:00

Jackson and I went to the grocery store today. He was tired, and didn't want to ride in the cart. So I let him help me push it instead. He figured out (without my prompting) that he could stand on the bottom rack and ride, then just hang from the bar holding his feet up and ride. Very exciting stuff for my little 2 year old. Even more exciting was the thrill of helping me shop. First, he found the s'mores display and in went the marshmallows. I spent too long reading packages in the soup aisle, and boxes of Mac n' Cheese were tossed into the cart. I stopped by the candy aisle to get some new potty "beans" and he threw several bags of candy in, which I had to surreptitiously remove. I'm sure we'll have many adventures in grocery shopping to come, and on some of those trips cookies and crackers will make it home that I won't have see enter the cart.

A few days ago, Jackson showed me this:

He proudly proclaimed it "mine airplane".

Some time later, he converted it into this:

"bird".

Thus his imagination has taken flight.

Jackson loves Mr. Potato Head or "Tado Head" as he calls him. Sometimes, only his parts can be found, and that's fun, too.

We're still having our usual night time struggles. Right now, the ritual goes something like this:
1-Take Jackson up to bed. Change him, check his armpits for critters (ticks) and re-read a couple of stories.
2-I suggest we climb in the bed and I can "Hop Up" with him a bit. He refuses and goes on playing with whatever he was playing with before story time started. It could be blocks or trucks or this weekend, a handful of makeup wedges and a butterfly hairclip (Funnest toy he's had in a while).
3-I coax a hug and a series of kisses out of him, and tell him "Sweet Dreams, Jackson" which he echoes "Pweet Dweams, mommy."
4-I turn out his light, leaving the hall light on so he can see his toys.
5-Five minutes later, he's standing at his gate calling, "Mom...Mom...Mommeeeee!"
6-I may or may not come then, but I check up on him. Eventually, he might decide to climb into bed and and "move" over so I can "Hop Up". The important thing to him is that I say "Sweet Dreams" a couple of times everytime I check in.
7-Eventually, he will go to sleep. Maybe 1 or 2 hours after being put to bed. Usually in his bed, but sometimes not.

Shown here: Jackson rocks himself to sleep. With pillow, fuzzy "Blank", the book, 'As Quck as a Cricket", a bear, and a crayon.

Napping

2009-08-16T21:12:00.003-04:00

I slept the afternoon away with Jackson. He didn't even kick. Until he opened his eyes and saw me curled up in the fuzzy microfiber blanket that I wasn't sharing with him (gasp!). In an elaborate downward facing dog to the ribcage, he stole his fair portion away. Then we slept some more.

I dreamed that Jason came home early and made spaghetti. He's doing that now. Thank you, Jason.

Garden update

2009-08-09T19:37:00.004-04:00

Our garden has had it's share of successes and failures this year. Most importantly, late blight wiped out our tomatoes. Thats right, the same blight that caused the irish potato famine has caused a tomato famine across the whole northeast. But! we have had wild success with peas this year (our 18 inch dwarf peas grew to 9 feet with all the rain). And we seem to have the touch when it comes to sunflowers.

Finally! A vacation!

2009-08-09T19:07:00.004-04:00

We took a three day vacation to Cape Cod over the fourth of July week. We were very lucky to get two and a half of the only sunny days the Cape has seen this summer. It was beautiful, relaxing, and Jack had a blast at the beach! Those who are our friends on Facebook can check out more photos there.

Congratulations Wesley & Lessie!!

2009-08-01T22:22:00.002-04:00

Love You, Mama

2009-07-26T21:47:00.000-04:00

Tonight, Jackson said his first ever, "Love you, Mama."
As a response to my "Love you, Jackson."

Shout out to Jason for repeating the phrase at every opportunity.
"Love you, Jason!"

LoJack for Babies

2009-07-24T02:11:00.004-04:00

A few weeks ago, Jackson bolted in Target. When I found him, he was 1/2 way across the store. So I spent the night comparing child locating devices on line--LoJack for babies. There are all kinds. Everything from GPS enabled devices that are trackable online (with or without a monthly subscription fee) to radio frequency beepers. I opted for the latter option--much cheaper, instant, and practical. Sure, my child could be abducted, but statistically that's a pretty remote possibility. The likely scenario is that he either runs or drifts away in a public place (or the backyard).
We opted for the Mommy I'm Here Child Locator. $25 at Amazon (link from the blog title). This one seemed the most practical and had better reviews. The only negatives were from units that arrived with a dead battery. Our's arrived in good working order.
Only drawbacks are that it sometimes beeps with no apparent reason, but I could've leaned on the button. You also have to thread it through something-- a belt or shoelaces for example. Minor inconvenience for peace of mind. Bonus, I'm not the parent with a toddler on a tether.

Some Pics from the Spring

2009-07-24T01:43:00.002-04:00

New Features

2009-07-24T01:41:00.002-04:00

I'm trying some new blogger gadgets. There's a new blog list, if I missed you, it wasn't because I think your blog is dull (I wouldn't exclude you for that), its just that I forgot or didn't have the link handy. Remind me. This new list lets me see when you have a new post. It also saves me a click to Jamie's blog where I had been getting that info.

In the interest of full disclosure, I'm keeping tabs on you, my readers in other ways. I have a new site monitor that collects data on my viewing traffic. It's imperfect, but compelling enough to be latest OCD fixation. And hey, if the government can data-mine the web, shouldn't I get in on the game as well? I need to know if they are watching me.

Try the new search tool. Next time you want to find that post from forever ago, you can.

Hopefully the best gadget of all is the one that allows me to send this post via email. Here's hoping for format compatibility.

Emu Blogger?

2009-07-18T21:02:00.001-04:00

Hi Emu Blogger.
We don't know who you are and your profile is private.
It sounds like you know us. Send us an invite to your blog.

Or, if you wish to remain unknown, that's cool too.

Fat Cat?

2009-07-16T23:04:00.005-04:00

Jack has been going around the house asking "Fat Cat?" for some 6 weeks now. It has been a mystery. We do have a fat cat, but if I refer to his girth, I call him "Fatty Ballooey". I haven't been using this name lately, I've been calling the furball "Ballooey Kitty" mostly. Usually the feline in question is nowhere to be seen when Jack poses the question. I sometimes wonder if he is asking for the cat, or where the cat is, but it doesn't seem likely because when he sees the cats, he squeals and the cats skedaddle through the hole in the door.

A few days ago, he said "fat cat" in the closet, which really made no sense since its not a favorite haunt of my fluffy kitty. He then requested to be lifted, and reached out for the bag of goldfish crackers left on the shelf (leftover from our camping trip.)

So, 1 mystery solved. Another mystery opened. Jack can say "Fish" very clearly, and says "Crack" for all other crackers. (Ironic since he goes after crackers as if they were indeed crack cocaine). It seems strange that combining 2 words he says clearly made both words corrupt. I am enjoying hearing his language development unfold. Hoping to soon post at length with a list of his sweet utterances and the English translations, before his speech grows up and I forget.

See, Mom...

2009-07-14T20:30:00.002-04:00

"See, Mom...Ope"

That's was Jackson's proud announcement of the day.
He unlocked the deadbolt for the first time.
We are doomed.

Ben's the man!

2009-06-26T22:23:00.005-04:00

We went to visit Ben and Nicole in their awesome new house last weekend (in conjunction with a visit from Sheree's mom Chris and brother Ellis). Part of being married to a member of the Swenson family is having to visit some kind of tourist type attraction. They suffer from some kind of compulsion, I don't know what it is. So, after we had breakfast, the topic of "what are we going to do?" came up. Ben thought for a moment, then suggested we head to Camden to see the USS New Jersey. My initial reaction was "lame!". Ben told me to shut up, "it'll be all right". So after walking around the battleship for an hour or so, we headed up to the top deck, where there was a BREW FEST! Fifteen local micro breweries with three to five FREE beers each.

As you can see, a good time was had by all!

Life

2009-06-13T22:19:00.007-04:00

Just saw a blurb in the news about this guy. His name is Jeff Hanson and he was a rising star in the Minneapolis indie-rock scene. Apparently he was found dead in his new apartment after falling and hitting his head. He was 31.

I'm writing this because, like him, we have so much ahead of us, so much to expect from life. But, life is short and unpredictable. Live life like you mean it, and be thankful for what you have, because you never know. Life is fragile and short, then its back to being space dust.

So, BIG LOVE to all who care enough to check in on our little family's blog! Bigger love to everyone who helped us along the way. Biggest love to my family. (Jason)

mustard

2009-06-05T21:17:00.001-04:00

Upon request, I gave Jackson a post bedtime snack of hotdog, ketchup, mustard, and cheese. A few minutes later, he came trudging into the kitchen shouting the following:
"hep"
"wa'er"
"hep"

I guess the mustard was a little spicey. Oops.

Hopeless tomato addiction!

2009-05-30T19:10:00.008-04:00

Yellow Pear. Expect them in their millions!
White Wonder. Almost white beefsteak with a really mild flavor. Even kids who don't like tomatoes will like these.

Striped German. Seems a lot like a Brandywine variant, but I liked the color and they are supposed to taste awesome.

Mr. Stripey. Another wierd looking tomato. They produce like crazy according to the description.

German Johnson. Questionable name aside, these are supposed to be prolific, and good for sauce.

Cherrokee Purple. Old Tennessee heirloom from, you guessed it, Tennessee Cherrokee indians.

Brasndywine Yellow. Amish heirloom that can grow up to 3 pounds. Dream big says I.

Brandywine (Sudduth's strain). This is considered one of the oldest strains of a true american heirloom. It is what tomatoes should taste like.

Black Prince. Russian's seem to introduce a lot of black tomatoes, and this is one of the oldest. Red wine is mentioned in the flavor description. I can't freakin' wait!

Black Krim. Another russian black, more prolific, and make a great sauce.Aunt Ruby's German Green. Just wanted to try a green tomato. They are supposed to be very mild, should go great in salsa with tomatillos.

I admit it! I am a tomato addict! Here are a few of the varieties we are trying this year. I go to a nursery for something totally NOT related to tomatoes, and come home with a new one. Hopefully they turn out as well as the pictures that I stole from various seed websites. I highly recommend Victory Seed Savers, and chiliplants.com for those who are likewise obsessed. Here's to a successful garden season!

Bugs

2009-05-26T21:48:00.004-04:00

Everyone once in a while, I am struck by the reality that everything my child knows must be spoon fed to him. He picks up bits of information from casual contact with friends, strangers, books, and TV. For the most part, though--the information gained has come from his parents. Last fall, I realized I had yet to teach him all the parts of a room. He knew about the walls, the doors, closets, and floors, but I had underlooked the ceiling. So we took 5 minutes to learn about it.

As we're heading into summer, we're spending a lot of time outdoors, which is teeming with insect life (especially in this wet and rural climate). One day, we came across a pile of sugar ants and Jackson proudly shouted, "Bee!". Several of Jack's books feature bees, and I make a big deal of it with buzzing sounds and tickling. Somehow, we haven't read about any other insects worth getting excited about. We do have a book about bugs that Jackson likes, but they are personified and busy building a house. They don't really relate to the critters we find outside.

So, we crouched down to talk about the ants. Now when a carpenter ant finds its way inside, Jackson is on the seen "Ant! Stomp!" (Still working on context, stomp ants inside and leave them be outside.) When we go for walks, we pass through swarms of gnats. The first time, Jackson shouted "Bee!" So we spent some time talking about the flies. Look a few posts back and y0u can see the hilarity that ensues when there are flies inside.

When we come across the insect life, I describe each one in a specific way. Now Jack knows about the ants, flies, spiders, butterflies, ladybugs, and caterpillars. It's occurred to me that my specificity is great, but it still leaves a little knowledge gap. I haven't found a way to work the word "bug" into Jack's developing vocabulary. I don't even know how to approach it. For the most part, I use the specific word for the type of insect I meet (unless there's a particularly annoying swarm, and then the word "bug" is accompanied by a few expletives I'd rather not draw attention to with my toddler). When I find an opportunity to teach the word, I expect it to be in the context of true bugs, and even then I'll probably be specific "box elder bug" or "stink bug". Should I be reassured that eventually my boy will attend preschool or kindergarten and quickly be schooled by his peers on the generic term for all tiny, mostly flighted creatures. Or should I take the responsibility to teach him more seriously and make sure he knows his preschool pop culture to prevent any playground embarrassments?

New Phrases

2009-05-22T21:19:00.001-04:00

"Uht's up, Daad? Uht do-i"

That's, "What's up, Dad. What are you doing?"

Sounds like random syllables, but when you have the secret decoder, its very endearing.

The REAL cure-all.

2009-05-14T15:04:00.004-04:00

I have discovered a cure for all the misery and woe in the world. Baby laughter.

Now if I can figure out how to get it into bottles for sale!

Garden update....

2009-05-12T14:52:00.011-04:00

We have been pretty active in the yard this year, and the garden is coming along nicely.

Lots of seedlings.

Peas are up and about a foot tall. Still waiting for flowers.

After several years, asparagus is producing. Sheree is thrilled.

We bought Llama manure for the garden. It came with millions of redworms!

Sweet Dreams -- Let the Wild Rumpus Begin.

2009-05-11T23:39:00.004-04:00

I think this is the new series. Like Ethan and Kate in their stroller, I'll be doing Jackson asleep in the Rocker. Look closely, you'll see that "Where the Wild Things Are" is now on our regular reading rotation.

Moms

2009-05-09T23:52:00.006-04:00

"It's not easy being a mother. If it were, fathers would do it."

Staying up late to blog about mothers. I am suprised how easily every woman I know who is a mother, makes it look like she has some kind of college degree in mothering. I will keep it short, every last one of you are amazing! I am so lucky to have Sheree for my wife, and thankful for my own mother who put up with so much from us boys. I'm thankful for grandmothers who showed us kids what kindness was. I love you all!

"All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel Mother" -Abraham Lincoln

Pics

2009-05-07T22:37:00.004-04:00

Jackson is trying out his new art wall.
Kickin' back in the carseat.
Sweet repose. I took him out for a walk hoping he'd crash.
The 24 hour fascination with the new potty. Jackson took it to bed with him. We had to take it away though, he was too distracted opening and closing the compartments.

Boots--check, Hat--check, pirate shirt--check.

25 things...

2009-05-07T21:41:00.005-04:00

A few weeks ago, I was thinking about those about me lists that circulate periodically. I had the idea that "25 things rattling around in the bottom of my bag would be more interesting than "25 things I wrote prose on as a 9 year old". I'd been planning to document the removal of 15 lbs of coin and rubbish from my purse. Then I went ahead and cleaned it out to find a Dr's appt card--opportunity missed.

A new opportunity has arisen. I offer you "25 things rattling around in the bottom of Jackson's bag".

1-cardboard center from the paper towels. We call it a "Doot-do-dooo" since that's what we shout into one end.
2-plastic jar repurposed to hold 3-4.
3-the velcro wooden food and
4-wooden knife. A gift from Nana for Jackson to chop. Current fruit pairs are lemon-lemon, pear top-orange bottom, orange top-mushroom stem, mushroom top-lime bottom.
5-gift bag from Beth & AJ. holding items 6-8
6-sand toys sans pail
7-scented jar candle. holds item 8
8-penny
9-black CD case. contains item 10.
10-red and black child sized sunglasses.
11-three gum containers. Opens 3 ways. (Jess, Jackson was thrilled when I brought these home!)
12-two more sand tools. funnel on a stick and corner castle mold
13-fork
14-cup without the sippy top
15-two pens
16-large plastic egg. holding smaller plastic egg.
17-lego 1/2 arch
18-clear plastic bra strap
19-another penny
20-post-it pad
21-screw
22-three more legos

And removed from the bag before this post:

23-two child's plates. One containing 24
24-a fried egg, cut into bite sized pieces
25-tiny green Vera Bradley bag. (Jack wore this for days on his shoulder, packing it with odds and ends and calling it his "Purrr". He was even sleeping with it on his arm.)

Hoy I Come!

2009-05-02T08:54:00.005-04:00

I think I mentioned Jackson's love of the park. It's time we brought a little piece of it home. I need to get some lumber and build a frame, and I planned to buy a slide. After slide shopping a bit, I changed my mind. I can't bring myself to shell out $200-$500 for a piece of plastic. Instead I turned to my local freecyclers. I hope you all know about freecycle.com. It's an online user group, actually hundreds of local groups, hosted by yahoo. You can send out 2 types of ads "wanted" and "offer". I placed the following: Wanted, slide. Offered, slate tile remnants (left over from doing our floors, and cluttering the space under the deck where we did the cutting), dishes. And I responded to a request for scrap metal (goodbye environmental hazard of a wood stove). It's a great way to exchange stuff, keeping it out of landfills, and get stuff you need, and like the name suggests, its all completely free!!
Overnight, I was offered a slide with 2 swings and a chin up bar, and a sidewinder slide with 2 swings and a climbing rope. More offers trickled in after that, but I didn't want to get greedy. Thursday, I brought home the first slide, when we got to the gifthouse, I told Jackson what we were doing there, and he started begging to get out of the car. I loaded in the slide and told him what it was. The whole way home, he pointed at it and said slide. When we got home, he followed closely as I got it out of the car and looked for a place to keep it while making plans for the structure. I propped it up on some bags of soil we have.

Here are a few other playground slides to demonstrate Jack's enthusiasm.

Two

2009-04-29T19:15:00.005-04:00

This post will probably be a mishmash of what life is like right now. I'm posting from the bathroom. We have recently become the household of baths every night. We had been the household of baths "every other night" which I'm a little ashamed to say turned into the house of "Hey, when's the last time Jackson had a bath?!" Times have changed for two reasons. First, its warmed up. By that I mean its been near 90 degree weather! We are enjoying it, Jackson has been to the park frequently, and he keeps sneaking out the back door and down the stairs to dig in the sand. So he's become an extra dirty kid. The other reason for the baths is that Jackson has some kind of a rash. It started on his thigh, spread to his belly, then slowly crept across his whole body. It started 3 weeks ago. Jackson doesn't seem sick in anyway, so we weren't overly concerned in the beginning. We mentioned it to the pediatrician at Jack's 2 year appointment last week, when the rash covered 1/2 of his body. The doctor wasn't concerned at all either.
Even though the rash doesn't itch, we got some hydro cortisone cream to try to clear it up. Since its an all over rash, I slathered it on kinda heavy. Last night, I noticed red dots all over Jack's cheeks and neck, little broken capillary dots. My online searched turned up options like Meningococcea and bleeding problems. So we headed back to the pediatrician today. He said the rash still doesn't look like anything, but we are trying to get an appointment with a dermatologist sometime this quarter (getting a doctor's appt in Connecticut is impossible!) and we had to have blood drawn for a platelet count. Cross your fingers that the broken capillaries were caused by the cream and we don't have something more serious on our hands.

Other things that are going on? Well, I mentioned Jackson is sneaking out the door. He wants to be outside all the time! It's great, except it makes it hard to keep the household functioning--can't really make dinner from outside. And the trips to the park? Well, they often start with Jackson shouting, "Park! Par Par Paaaarkkk!" At the park, Jackson mostly likes the slides. At the top, he calls out, "Hoy I come!" He hits the ground running and dashes back up the stairs to come down again, like he's all grown up or something. Monday night, I spied asparagus in the garden and sauteed them for myself, then cooked a few down further and pureed with milk to call soup. It was pretty tasty, and Jack had a bit (before Ally got to it). Next time, I'll name it "dip" and hope he consumes it faster.

Bedtime is also a bit unusual. We start with the typical routine--fresh diaper, optional pajamas, 2 stories, tuck him in bed, gate the door. Jackson usually gets back up, plays, calls for me. I'll tuck him back in once. He invariable gets up again. Lately, he's been finally going to sleep in the rocking chair. Most nights for the last few weeks. It's an adorable sight, see for yourself.

I'm off to tuck Jackson back in. I'm sure to hear him say, "Move. Hop", that's I'll move over so you can hop up into bed with me.

Lead Levels

2009-04-22T21:26:00.004-04:00

Tuesday was Jack's birthday (Yeah--happy birthday, boy!) I'll post about that event, and the subsequent, incessant, cutting and pounding (thanks, Mom) later. For now, a few lines about what's been eating at me--that is the trip to the pediatrician. I could complain about the shortage of HIB vaccine or Jack's mysterious spreading rash which the doctor proclaimed was "contact dermatitis" (my ass). Or I could say how weird it is that Jack's head size didn't change at all, and sometimes increases or even decreases in size depending on who the nurse is. I could also rave about how well Jackson takes his pricks, staring stoically and in silence at the nurse. These topics are all of passing interest.

The thing that's eating at me is the lead test, taken by capillary. By way of background, it has been determined that there is no safe level of lead. The Dept of Health gets involved when the level is > 10 micrograms/deciliter, serious action with chelation and home remediation starts at around 50 micrograms/deciliter. Jackson's lead levels were below these thresholds at 5 micrograms/deciliter. By official lead accounting, its normal and nothing to be alarmed about. Except that the level should be nothing, zip, zero, undetectable. There are studies that show a linear relationship between even low lead levels of lead and IQ impact. 10 micrograms/deciliter has an impact of -7 IQ points. (There go the "trivial" few IQ points I pumped so much precious, time consuming, stressful breast milk to give my child.)

Historically speaking, lead levels of kids my age (born 1976-1980) had a mean value of 15 micrograms/deciliter. After lead paint was banned in 1978, the levels have gone down, and today's kids have a mean value of 2.7 micrograms/deciliter. Jackson's level is twice that.

We live in a brand new house (see previous post), with clean well water running through new lead free pipes. We don't use brightly colored foreign stoneware (as far as it can be avoided). We don't have antique tin toys or let Jackson play with the ammunition. So, where is the contamination coming from? I've been through latest list of lead based toy recalls. Nothing we own is on the list, but there are certainly similar items. It could be anything. Is it the painted spots on his bath toys? The zippers on his pants? The vinyl housed flashing light of his spider man jacket? How about his toy boxes? Or new froggy boots that he's worn all day every day since Easter? Maybe a contaminant in his daily multivitamin. Is it our dishes? They're purchased in a US big box store and light in color (typically reds are more likely to be lead based glazes). We only have 1 vinyl mini blind in the house, but that could be the source.

Point is, there is no way of knowing where the lead is coming from. This is a consequence of globalization and failure to enforce regulations. Even buying all of our consumer goods from reputable US made sources (as if that were possible) wouldn't guarantee safety, since they could just as easily get a batch of contaminated raw materials to work with.

In our home, we go through considerable effort to avoid contaminations. We buy US goods where practical, spend extra on local-ish free range meats and organic vegetables, produce our own eggs, limit high sugar content foods (corn syrup has a 20% contamination with mercury rate, by the way), eschew manufactured food items (like those pedialyte drinks they're pushing these days). We built a new house rather than remodel an old one that might be contaminated.
Despite these efforts, we're powerless against things like heavy metal contamination or food poisoning.

http://www.cdc.gov/MMWR/PDF/rr/rr5608.pdf

Home Improvements

2009-04-21T21:54:00.006-04:00

We built our own house and moved in 4 years ago. Much of the work we did ourselves (I think Jason blogged about this a while back) cleared the land, did all the finish work from decks to paint to floors to cabinet installs. We didn't take shortcuts on these things, and as a result, we lost enthusiasm as soon as the bank declared us officially "done". Totally burned out. Barely any home improvement was completed after that--1st because of the burnout, and then because it was impossible to do anything with Jackson needing constant attention.

As a result, our house looked like it was dropped in place by a tornado, like something out of the Wizard of Oz (luckily no curled up witch legs stuck out anywhere.) It's hard to really get a feel for that in the below picture since its winter, but trust me.

Same view in early Spring with a little effort at landscaping, a red door, and a stained front porch, and stairs on the back deck. It's starting to look like it belongs in the landscape.

Front view.

Rhubarb Pie

2009-04-13T08:31:00.002-04:00

Jackson is making rhubarb pie--from something that might be considered scratch.

Beans

2009-04-12T22:33:00.003-04:00

Beans have been a topic of conversation around here lately.
A couple of weeks ago at dinner time, Jackson was picking the few black beans I left unpulverized in the tacos and pronouncing, "Beans! Yumm!" (I questioned his parentage, that was definintely not a phrase anyone ever heard me say, enthusiastically or otherwise.)

And this evening, as he and Jason recounted the days events, Jason recalled, "and Mama gave you jelly beans."
Jackson replied, "Beans! [then, hugging jason] Ohhh Mamaam!"

I live for the hug and the "Ohhh Mamaam!"

Venting

2009-04-03T20:48:00.003-04:00

Katie got me started. I apologize in advance for the whiney tone.

This is what one day in the life of this working mother is like:

My son slept all last evening instead of all night. He was up for good before 5am. I had to change an extra gooey diaper when I should've been running out the door, packing a large laptop, purse, and lunch (no longer trusting the cafeteria after 2 recent and icky salad bar experiences)

I have a TON of real work to do. Instead, I spent 2 hours on the phone with the help [less] desk doing a software install for something I requested in early January. At my biweekly meeting with my boss, we discussed my upcoming review and lack of design support. He said, "Not much I can do about it now, you should've mentioned it a couple of weeks ago." I said, "I did". He said, "Not loudly enough." Then he said my husband better be taking me out on dates, I could ignore the rest of the religion, but weekly dates were a commandment from God.

After this, I headed across the street to visit the coffee guy that comes in Fridays for a knock-off frapuccino. It's a poor imitation, but he's a nice guy and it saved me the hassle of driving one town over. Also saved me $2.

At lunch, I read a NYT article by a Judith Warner who proclaimed the heresy that breastfeeding had no measurable benefits and wouldn't it be great if breast pumps were oneday banned!? The point was supposed to be that there's too much pressure on working mothers and we should all lighten up and band together to get more family leave. It also stated that her husband curled up his nose when he saw the bags of milk in the freezer and didn't want to have sex with her [ever again] because the pumping stretched her nipples out so far. Yes, there's too much pressure and we should get more family leave. However, the scientific verdict is pretty much out in favor of breastfeeding (several IQ points, superior nutrition, bonding, weight loss, less asthma, better immunity, and extremely low risk of melamine contamination) and despite its drawbacks, I am grateful for my pump. I also point out that a little nipple stretching is nothing compared to the stretching of labor and delivery. Here's the real rub in this article--we all spend 12 months panicky about how we're going to squeeze in multiple daily trips to the milking station, fulfill our workplace obligations and get home in time to see our child awake. Now there's an article from a journalist who is supposed to be on our side and instead throws another guilt trip on women for having gone to soo much effort to do it all when we could've been happily shaking up manufactured milkshakes for our babes.

In the afternoon, I returned a bunch of phone calls. One of these was answered by a lovely computerized female voice who asked me to type in the name of the person I was calling. My first attempt, I tried to use the keypad like I was texting (repeating the 6 three times to get to the n)--gibberish in, gibberish out. Second try I spelled Jensen with and "o", and the computerized voice offered me 2 people I wasn't interested in speaking to. Third time, I am sure I spelled it correctly, and I was offered nothing.

I spent the next couple of hours investigating who had totally blown my project budget, finding the person (who I have never even met) and getting incredibly unsatisfying responses to my questioning of just who was he, and what had he done for the 3.5 weeks he charged my program exclusively. About this point, someone commented on how I remained calm and collected all the time (Thanks, Betsy).

Then I got called into a stupid meeting to discuss an issue that had been resolved 3 months ago. I ended by saying, "I'll resend the email you received 12/18 from the person who has been managing that particular issue for 15 years so that you can copy it into the documentation. Oh, how many people would you like me to cc: and ask to reply all that they concur", hanging up, and muttering, "Jackass". I have several similar meetings each week with this same person.

In short this was a totally wasted workday.

I came home and Jackson threw open the front door and said, "Hi-ee!" Then he gave me a big hug and said, "Ahh mahmahm." I watched him (a delight after a 4 hour nap this afternoon) eat a whole watermelon. Well, actually, 2 macaronis off the floor (ewww, dropped them at lunch, mental note to invite the beagle in the scavange the floors more frequently), 3/4 banana, 25 mini mozzarella balls, bowl of sunchips, 1/2 cup (yes 1/2 cup) of peanut butter, 1/2 cup fruit cocktail, and nibbles from my soft taco. I'm sure I'll pay the penalty tomorrow morning. At least I didn't give him any raisins or prunes.

He took a brief pretend nap on the second stair with ducky who tickles his nose. Then he climbed the heaters to get to the window sills and look out. I changed a diaper (with raisins), helped him brush his 11 teeth (at 20 teeth, will he be chewing up the dried fruit? How about 16? The last month of poorly slept nights indicates we may have 16 soon). Jackson bounced on the giant exercise ball while I read about Harry the Dirty Dog and hoped the ball was wedged sufficiently into the corner so as not to topple over. Then I read Goodnight Moon (mostly from memory so Jack could turn several pages at a time back and forth) followed by Eyore, Be Happy. Then Jackson didn't want to go to bed, so I told him to call me back in when he was ready to sleep and turned out the light. Suddenly, he was ready for bed. I kissed him and 3 stuffed animals goodnight, then took my leave. Jackson followed and spent the next 1/2 hour with his chin leaning on the gate shouting, "Mamahmahhhm" After a while I started shouting back, "Jack Jahck Jaaaahck". I think he's sleeping now, but I hesitate to check incase he's not.

It rained today and is set to rain all weekend and all next weekend.

After posting this, I'm off to spend "datenight" doing the work I needed to do in the office today.

Pearly Whites.

2009-03-31T17:53:00.002-04:00

Maybe this is a mundane topic, but I'm going to share anyway.

Today, we went for Jackson first dental cleaning. He was amazing!!
Mostly, he sat on my legs and watched the hygienist work on my teeth. Every once in a while he got up to explore. The fish did have to be moved to a higher shelf. And Jackson fiddled a bit with the suction tool. Mostly though, he sat in my lap and considered drinking the mouthwash.

Then it was Jackson's turn to sit in the chair. He sat, he opened, he had his teeth counted, scraped, polished, and flouridated!!! Then, he had a little drink and made spitting noises into the bowl.

At the end, the dentist came in to look at my teeth. Jackson got up again, and managed to briefly get the suction tool stuck to his nose.

There was no running away, no crying, and no wreckage! Yeah for Jackson.

(Jason thinks this is a sign that we should stick to just 1 child. With our family history, another is bound to be a terror!)

Five things I love...

2009-03-11T03:01:00.005-04:00

I saw a post on another blog today titled "Five things I love" and thought it might be a good idea to list mine.

First---my boy. I LOVE this kid. He's friendly, intelligent, inquisitive, and FUNNY! I've heard it said that we love our children because we see something of ourselves in them. I love Jack because he is the opposite of me in a lot of ways. He loves people (recent shyness notwithstanding). It is a daily joy to see him learn new things and just enjoy life's little thrills so much. And just LOOK at him!

Second---my woman! Sheree is the perfect wife for a odd duck like me. She is kind, generous, an awesome mother, and she puts up with a lot from both of her boys. I would probably never have taken on challenges like building a house or moving across the country without her influence. To top it all off she's cute too!

Third---(grudgingly), my job. It's some kind of codependent relationship I'm sure, but I like what I do. It seems weird that someone who doesn't like people would enjoy working in retail management, but I really really do. I like that I can help people in the unenviable task of home repairs. I think it is at least partly because I have been there and know what it's like, but also because I like to swoop in and save their day. Try it, it's like crack after a while!

Fourth---My house in the woods. As previously mentioned, I'm an unwilling people person. The hermit life is obviously for me. Not being able to hear or see my neighbors (most of the time) is just plain good for my soul. Being able to hunt in my own yard is awesome too! Mostly, just having clean, wild, space around me is what keeps me from finding something tall and jumping though.

Fifth---Friends/family. I still don't fully understand it, but there are a whole lot of people out there who care about me. People who ask how I'm doing, and really care. That's a pretty big deal. Clarence the angel wrote in George's book "No man is a failure who has friends." Sometimes that's all that gets me out of bed in the morning. I love you all!

So...there it is. The challenge to all reading this is to complete the same exercise. If you blog, write your own "Five Things" post. If not, think it out. It will make you feel good. I promise.

Cheese and paperclips

2009-03-09T19:28:00.007-04:00

Jason is getting some stuff ready for eBay. There's a cast iron wok that I thought we had no use for, but apparently it makes a great toddler seat. I told Jackson I was going to take his picture. He put on his best Cheshire grin and said, "Cheee-eese".

I have a jar of paperclips. It's a mixed jar collected over the years--different sizes and colors. Jackson has been playing with it this week. He's been carrying around clips on a little saucer and moving them around. Yesterday, I noticed that all the clips on the saucer are metallic, and all of the clips in the bottom of the storage container are colored and plastic coated.

This is big news!!! First, its a milestone to sort things. Sorting blocks by shape is expected--toymakers go to some effort and expense to market shape sorters. However, this is a bigger milestone. First, there's no marketing involved. It's more a matter of covert sneaking off with the paperclips when no one was looking. Second, there was no prompt. No, "See this is a blue triangle with 3 sides--let's put it in the blue triangle hole with 3 sides. Oh no, it doesn't fit in the orange circle hole, try again." Jackson found the clips himself, made them into a toy, segregated them by type, and plays with them one pile at a time.

For me, its an even bigger milestone. One that signals that my boy is just like me--that's every parent's dream, right. See, sorting is my particular brand of O.C.D. I'm not a neat freak in anyone's imagination (sorry, Mom), but I do like the items on the shelf to be orderly. I like my closet arranged by season and color. I like my books and spices alphabetical (I let a few of these go in the name of having a career and family).

If I'm really really lucky, this is a signal that my child will be analytical. A sign that he'll think twice before making a decision. Maybe he'll even be a technical person with a slant toward the scientific. A mother can dream, right?

Garden mania sets in!

2009-03-09T17:17:00.014-04:00

In the dark cold months of a New England winter, there is little to do except plan for next years garden. We have an extra bad case of garden fever this year, and since we have had varying levels of success with gardening over the last few years, we have decided to go all in (and turn it into a parking area if we fail again).

First we tested our soil. PH is just slightly alkaline, nitrogen is low, phosphorous is just right, and potash is non-existent.

Next we procured an enormous pile of seeds. All the usual stuff: tomatoes, peppers, squash, beans, broccoli, peas, cucumbers, etc.

Next we plotted our garden. What will go where, in what quantities, paying attention to what was there last year. Drawing is to scale as this is a household with an engineer.

Now if only.....

Random stuff...

2009-03-09T16:58:00.005-04:00

This is a collection of random pictures to herald the goings on in Jacksonland.

Sheree is teaching Jack how to make faces. Lets hope this one doesn't stick.

Jackson is very interested in what goes on in the kitchen. Sheree got him a step stool which he uses to help with cleanup.

So patient.

Joy

2009-03-03T21:11:00.000-05:00

Snow Day

2009-03-03T19:51:00.004-05:00

Maybe you heard that we got totally dumped on by snow this week. I was disappointed. Not because it didn't snow enough, but because I keep being lulled into a false sense of spring. A few weeks ago, we had record high temperatures for a couple of days. High 60's in mid February. I thought winter was over, and then it got very very cold. This weekend was quite nice, I even ventured outside to do some yard work. I cleaned the chicken coop, I spread manure and wood ashes on the garden (hoping for a better season). Then, it snowed and snowed some more.

Today, Jackson and I decided to make the best of it and go out to play. Jackson was enthusiastic about getting all bundled up, he loves to wear his boots. Puts them on first thing in the morning, stomps around all day, often accents them with a stocking cap. (Usually sans pants, but whatever).

Previous snow days, Jackson has been less enthusiastic about the snow and cold than about the bundling up. In the past, he has refused to wear gloves. He can't get up when he falls down because his hands are cold, and he doesn't want to touch the snow. He hasn't liked the sled. Last time we had a good snow, he was happiest after I put away the sled and any thoughts of snowmen and instead brought out the lawn chair.

Today was different. Jackson wore his gloves and threw the snow and pushed it and stomped. He agreed to go for a ride on the sled, saying "Whoo Whoo" and when he looked somber after a few minutes, I asked if he was having fun. He replied with "Weee!". That lasted until I took a corner too hard, and my poor little one face planted. But he merrilly went back to throwing and stomping. I had to drag him back in the house.

I didn't take out the camera today, but I hope these pictures of Jackson not having enough fun outside give you the idea.

Pay It Forward.

2009-02-28T21:20:00.000-05:00

It's kind of like the movie...but better because you get to ACTUALLY be involved!!The first five people to respond to this post will get something made by me! My choice--for you! This offer does have some restrictions and limitations:
1. I make no guarantees that you will like what I make! (I can only hope)
2. What I create will be just for you.
3. It WILL be done this year.
4. You have no clue what it’s going to be … it may be cards, a bookmark, something delicious or a complete surprise to you (and me!) … who knows?
5. Most importantly, you must offer the same deal on your blog - the first 5 people to comment on your blog get something made by YOU!

Shameless self-promotion

2009-02-13T12:40:00.007-05:00

Jason again. As some of you are aware, I spend a great deal of time at a major home-improvement retailer. It's more like indentured servitude really. I have been questioned at times by customers and employees alike, as to my abilities in the DIY arena. So here are a number of pictures of all the ways I found to torment myself (and my wife) during the ongoing construction of our home

This is the finished kitchen (except for the mess which is ongoing). We put in the cabinets, the floor, and fabricated the countertops)

Granite tile countertops cost us around $400 total (plus a full week of labor)

Nobody asks me to build porches for them after seeing mine, but I think its just fine!

Three days in front of a wet saw gave us this. It is my most favorite part of the house (other than the fact that I can't see people from my house I mean).

Five feet across, all gauged indian slate, and covered with toddler toys these days.

We put in a highly unproductive garden.

We built a chicken coup and took up animal husbandry. It did eventually get a roof.Custom cut slate leaves that are now inset into the hallway floor (and my dreams for months afterwards-never again!).
We went cheap in the two "bedrooms" and used grooved shiplap pine planks. Not the intended use, but they look hot!Pergo in the hall, library, and master bedroom and closet. I wouldn't do it again though. I like the look of real wood (and our bamboo) too much.

And, for better or worse, THIS.

Carbon 1/2 Life

2009-02-11T01:20:00.001-05:00

I've been thinking about what it really means to be carbon neutral. Click the title link to read my ideas. Please join the conversation.

Dale Deloy Dodge -- In Memorium

2009-01-25T15:59:00.006-05:00

Jason's grandfather passed away Thursday January 15th. He was 79 years old and just shy of his 60 year anniversary to his wife, Catherine Mae "Pat" Dodge.

We spent a few days with Jason's family remembering Jason's grandfather, and for me, learning about his life, which was well lived. He was born in 1929 and raised in Ogden, Utah. His mother passed away when he was 11, and he spent time in foster care and living with other relatives. At 15 1/2, he enlisted in the marines (at a time when they didn't verify your age, possibly because of the great need for young men to fight the war). When he returned home, he enrolled at Weber State College and earned a 2 year degree to become an iron worker. He traveled throughout Utah working on various construction projects. He took the family with him on many of these jobs, and they lived in such places as Vernal and Tremonton, eventually settling back in Ogden. Jason's grandmother stayed in their Ogden home to raise her three children while Dale continued to travel for work and for adventure.

In way of adventure, Dale enjoyed riding rodeo--Aren't these great photos!? (presuming I've worked out technical difficulties, if not, they'll show up here eventually) Dale competed in rodeos around the intermountain area. He was also an amateur boxer.

As an iron worker, he continued to travel the state. The family wasn't wealthy, and Dale often found accommodations on park benches or other less inviting places. With the help of his sons, Dale installed the steeple on the Ogden Temple--he signed the interior.

Dale also found time to support the cause of the laborer. Some photos turned up of Dale protesting agricultural conditions with Caesar Chavez. (This is really great stuff that no one has talked about before.)

In 1991, Dale suffered a stroke which left him mostly paralyzed and without speech. At the time, the doctors didn't think he would survive. His family says he was too tough and mean for death to take him at that time. Despite his disability and the pain he suffered, he remained cheerful (possibly more so than before). Every visit with Dale included a "hand shake" during which he would attempt (and succeed) to squeeze the life out of your fingers. After 17 years and a series of illnesses, Dale finally succumbed. He will be missed.

For those of you who need hope.

2009-01-14T20:45:00.003-05:00

Quick update on the sleeping arrangements. We are now 10 nights into the new arrangements. For nights 2-4, there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth. He woke several times a night, and Jason and I took turns squeezing into his bed, or sleeping on the floor in the pile of blankets meant to catch him should he fall.
Now, Jackson may get up and whine, but once I disappear from sight, he goes back to bed, and tucks himself in. Sometimes, like tonight, he stays in bed when I get up (takes a few bits of his blanket, "numm, numm") and goes to sleep.
He wakes 1-2 times each night. I walk down the hall, pick him up, squeeze him a bit, and tuck him back in bed...Where he stays!!!

So, we are a happy sleeping family.

And those of you who are in the throws of night time nightmares..well, if Jackson can adjust, anybaby can.

Never too young for the M pillows!

2009-01-06T23:22:00.002-05:00

Sleep Training? Torture? Pick your term.

2009-01-06T21:44:00.005-05:00

I know I owe the blog a lot of love after an apparent 3 month hiatus, and I'm overdue with my holiday reports. But for now, lets start with the present.

Over the holidays, we made the decision to buckle in and move Jack from his current sleeping place (8pm-3am in the pack-n-play, 3am-7am in our bed. I gave up on leaving him in his bed all night when he started climbing out in the middle of the night.) So, Sunday, we solicited Jack's help to take apart the crib in his room and turn it into his big boy bed, with a thick layer of blankets on the floor to cushion any potential falls. He was enthusiastic. At night, he was enthusiastic to climb in for story time. At 8 O'clock, he fell asleep suckling. I took photos to document what I expected would be an all too short victory.
Sometime in the wee hours, I woke and walked down the hall to see my husband snuggled up with my boy on the 2 foot wide mattress. I don't know how I slept through the tempest.
Last night, we got off to a much rougher start. Jackson was agreeable about getting ready for bed in his new room. But he didn't take the easy road to sleep. Instead, I left an awake baby. I spent the next 1/2 hour listening to bloodcurdling sceams. I talked myself down from reassuring him, since I've found it just encourages the screams. He finally quieted down. When I went to check, he had climbed back into bed and snuggled up for the night. That lasted until midnight. I joined him in the bed at first, and then on the floor. When I first came in, he tried to shove me out of the room, finally agreeing I could stay. It took along time for sleep to overcome his rage.
The novelty has clearly worn off. Tonight, the resistance started the minute I indicated we were headed toward his room. We fought through the diaper change, pajama cladding, and storytime. The actual bedtime was a bit better. He carried on until I was out of sight,then settled down for bed. Here's hoping he sleeps for a solid block of time tonight..

My child is an absolute joy during the daylight hours. At sunset Mr. Hyde comes out. That's why its taken so long to make the move (plus we're social creatures, and I enjoy sleeping with the little monkey). Here's hoping he takes to the new arrangements soon.

In case you're wondering, its a tossup whether the crib mattress or the floor is less comfortable.

1.5 Year

2008-11-08T20:40:00.002-05:00

MyHeritage: Family trees - Genealogy - Celebrities - Collage - Morph

It's a Beautiful Day!

2008-11-08T11:26:00.005-05:00

............America, we are a better country than these last eight years. We are a better country than this. This country is more decent than one where a woman in Ohio, on the brink of retirement, finds herself one illness away from disaster after a lifetime of hard work.

We're a better country than one where a man in Indiana has to pack up the equipment that he's worked on for 20 years and watch as it's shipped off to China, and then chokes up as he explains how he felt like a failure when he went home to tell his family the news.

We are more compassionate than a government that lets veterans sleep on our streets and families slide into poverty...that sits on it's hands while a major American city drowns before our eyes.

Tonight, I say to the people of America, to Democrats and Republicans and independents across this great land....................................

ENOUGH!

Time for Jason to weigh in. I'll admit I wasn't sure about Barack Obama until his acceptance speech at the DNC. But as the word "ENOUGH!" echoed across the stadium, I knew THIS was the candidate we have been praying for. The country doesn't just need strong leadership, economic relief, security, etc. We need to feel inspired. Proud. President Obama made us feel hope. Think about it, when was the last time you saw 240,000 people cry when their candidate was elected? It didn't even happen when Reagan was elected, and he had a larger electoral victory. Obama has everything Bill Clinton had in terms of intelligence, charisma, and an understanding of what us common folk are going through. Plus higher moral standards and a lifelong commitment to making things better. He has served as a teacher, a community activist, a Senator, and now as President. Not just someone who we can grab a beer with.

I admit also that I was very surprised at my reaction to his campaign and eventual election. I believe in him. I teared up when he won. There is a palpable sense of HOPE in this country that will finally change the tone of politics and finally bring American attitudes into the now eight-year-old millennium. Why this hope?

This little boy. We believe in politicians because we want to give something meaningful, something better, to our children. I don't work nights because I want to. Sheree doesn't get up at all hours of the night because it's fun. We love this little boy, and we are trying to give him something that matters: love, security, good health, and HOPE! We voted for Barack Obama because of hope. We want to pass that kind of hope, and the country that that hope will create, to Jack.

I'm certain some people reading this blog didn't vote for Obama. That's ok. But we all have to honor the results of this election. The situation this country is in is dire. We all have to support this good man as he works to correct the problems we face.

So, I'm sitting here writing this, listening to U2 sing about how "It's a Beautiful Day!". I'll change and feed Jack, then take him to his beautiful mother for a night on the town. Then I'll go to work. Like always. But with a new sense of hope that we can get things in America back on track.

Jack's future kitchen

2008-11-06T00:43:00.003-05:00

Brandon and Sarah posted about their desire to have more space saver toys. Their comment thread brought up kitchens. This is the kitchen I'm going to make for Jackson someday. It's part of a showroom at the New Haven Ikea. It's built onto a simple shelf; black spongy coasters serve as "burners", there's a rubbermaid bin sunk in for the sink, and drawer pulls serve as knobs. Bonus--its not painted stereotypically girly pink. There's a little cupboard above it (optional).

I can imagine building this as a little piece of furniture on wheels so it can be pushed out of the way. For spacesaving, it could be built as a dropleaf kitchen shelf.

Some comments on milk

2008-11-05T23:14:00.004-05:00

I've been meaning to post about breastfeeding for a while. I actually have several posts to do on this. The mothers out there know what a rocky road it is. Today's topic is extended breastfeeding, something that's usually reserved for snide whispers. In this country its considered a bit weird, and I admit to having a mental stereotype of people who do it, something I had a little internal struggle with when we hit the 12 month mark.
The AMA recommends breastfeeding exclusive for the 1st 6 months, and continuing for "atleast" the first year. The WHO recommends 2 years. Why the discrepancy? Well, I think this country is struggling to overcome its midcentury belief that "only poor people breastfeed", "its gross", and "formula is best". After that PR nightmare (did the formula companies use the same ad agency as cigarettes? seriously!) 12 months may be a stretch goal. The WHO on the otherhand is trying to make sure that children in the undeveloped world get one of the few advantages mother's can afford. It's also the best tool they have to stave off waterborn illnness, a major cause of infant death, since there's no need to mix it with water.
Most American mothers try to breastfeed in the hospital, more than half don't make it 2 months. The ones who make it through say "whew" at the 12 month mark and swiftly switch to cow's milk. There is a small minority that keeps going. As a new mother, I had a goal of 6 months, and then see what happens. (After the first few days and weeks, that seemed like an impossible achievement--but that's another post). I read up a bit on the recommendations, and started prying open my own mind on the idea of extended nursing. Apparently, there's scant scientific evidence of the benefits of toddler nursing in the US, but numerous studies have tried to find the negatives (science to support public opinion?) and they didn't come up with any.
About a year ago, I saw my doctor for my 6 month post partum check-up. We were talking about breastfeeding, and she casually said how things would go...and then we'd be toddler nursing, night and morning... What-What!? I heard the electronic rewind screech in my mind when she said it.
At 12 months, we were still breastfeeding. Jackson loved it. The descriptives, "alactrity", "enthusiasm", and "gusto" are inadequate to convey his excitement for nursing, or the sense of urgency he puts into it. I'm away from my baby 9 hours a day, so I wasn't about to deny him something that is clearly so important to him.
I did decide to break him from the all night feeding. This was really hard! I tried to use a gradual method to stop it. I set up some rules. 1--Jackson had to sleep in his own bed (right next to mine) until 5am. 2--No picking up screaming child (and he screamed!!) 3--I would give him milk when he asked for it, but only from a bottle. 4--After a few weeks, I would start diluting the milk with water until it was just water. Amazingly, the strategy worked. The first few nights were brutal, but after a week, Jackson agreed to go back to sleep in his own bed, and within 6 weeks, he was sleeping without sustenance from 7:30-5:00 (sometimes 4:30) when he woke for milk, and went back to sleep for an hour. (Such a relief after over a year of hourly interrupted sleep).
This method meant that I still had to pack my pump to and from work, and keep my timeslot in the overpacked lactation room so that I would have milk for overnight. There was another woman with a child the same age as Jack. On his 1st birthday, she [smugly] posted a note regarding her freedom from the milk machine. I was feeling like the weird woman who was still breastfeeding--How old is that child!? Then I checked in on my friend in my old lactation room, and she was still feeding her son. I asked a few more people and found out that there are actually a bunch of us quietly continuing past the first year. Many of us are professionals, surprisingly continuing to put in the extra effort.
Jackson was already weaned during the day since he was driven to vampirism early. (see Milk, soap, and cheese.) That's not the case for everyone. I saw my friend this summer who has extended breastfed all of her children. I was impressed at her patience--she spent 1/2 hour exposed in the kitchen while her 14 month old suckled and napped intermittently.
We're now at 18 months, and continuing to nurse for some indeterminate length of time. Jack's enthusiasm has not waned. We've had a cold this weekend, and Jackson hasn't been able to breath and suck at the same time. The other night, he threw an absolute fit when he couldn't suckle. He was writhing around and bawling. Luckily Jason was home, and able to sit with him while I dug my pump out of the closet. I put the milk in a sippy cup, and Jackson bawled louder, refusing to take it. He was relieved when I put in into a bottle. I wasn't able to pump much milk, and the wailing resumed when it was gone. Fortunatley, I still have stock in the freezer.
There are studies that show that antibody levels in toddler breast milk are even higher than in milk produced for young babies. I noticed my milk looks thicker than it used to, and I'm glad I can offer it.
I don't see myself as someone who fits the typical stereotype of a la leche leaguer. I think I'm as close as an engaged parent gets to the opposite of that. I'm not someone who gushes about the bonding that comes from nursing. I don't experience that personally, although I think Jackson does. I nurse because I know it offers advantages in immunity, allergy prevention, IQ, and development. I'm skeptical about the food industry (apparently with good reason--so glad I'm not in China!), and I don't believe they can adequately synthesize a food that has evolved over millenia. I want to make sure my child has the advantages that are within my means to provide.
I hope reading my story widened your awareness a bit. I'm not going to tell anyone how to raise their children, but I want other mother's to know that its OK either way, and I'd like to dissipate some of the whispers uttered at the expense of those of us who take "atleast 12 months" to mean something besides "exactly 12 months".

1.5 years.

2008-11-05T22:11:00.008-05:00

Happy 1/5 years, Jackson (a couple weeks late, sorry). We celebrated with a [finally] needed haircut. His hair was getting pretty crazy. Jackson was a pretty good sport. We took a lot of breaks and Jackson mowed the deck in the interlude. Too bad we didn't get a picture of that.

Jack is obsessed with writing utensils. Crayons, Pens, Dry Erase Markers. Lids off of course. We are working on the concept of "Only writing on papers", and composing letters of gratitude to Mr Clean for the magic erasers. I've spent too much time asking that the lids be placed on the markes, and the orange marker on the "future engineer" shirt may've brought me to the edge. For now, no more markers. But I am thrilled to let Jackson sit in the chair and color for long periods of time. I don't mind wiping down the furniture afterward too much.

Jackson has developed a couple of new quirks. He now spends a lot of time checking his toes for lint. He plops down, peels off his socks, and carefully pulls each pair of toes apart. If there's lint, he grabs it, holds it at arms length, and scrunches his nose while he rubs his fingers together to get it off. I really need to get this on tape!

We're also taking a swimming class. The first 2 weeks, it was fun, but sort of seemed to be a waste of time. Well, not a waste of time, but not worth rushing out of work early and making Jason meet me there. We practice blowing bubbles, kicking and paddling, and jumping off the edge. Jackson mostly grips my hip with his knees and uses his toes to push down my suit bottom. He's a big fan of the squirty tub toys. When I put him on the edge to jump back in, he tries to run over to the water aerobic barbells instead. last weekend, we took a bath in our little used, but so fabulous jacuzzi tub. Jackson actually put his face under and blew some bubbles!! Monday, he was in peak performance, blowing bubbles, kicking, and gleefully jumping off the edge. He was also laughing very loudly the whole time! It was great. I'm sure the exhuberance was an artifact of being too tired due to the return of standard time, but I'll take it! Tonight, Jackson was less of a performer, but we still had fun. He did make an attempt at putting his whole face under when he saw the instructor go under and blow bubbles. After drinking in a bit of water, he wouldn't try again, but its a start.

We're taking the class with Beth and AJ. The boys are starting to play together, which is very exciting to see. Today, they tried to high five. I don't think they made contact, but it was too cute! There are giant legos in the lobby, and AJ hands them to Jack who is glad to take them. They follow each other around a little bridge, and share food. Apparently Beth does a much better job of packing lunch than I do, so mostly Jackson is stealing AJ's food. I'm getting better though.

We're imagining Jackson saying more words. He's a big fan of the onomatopoeia, especially animal noises. He likes to crow in echo to the rooster. He also says "ku ku" at the cuckoo clock and meow to the cat. In terms of real words--I hear alot of Dada, A-ee (Ally), Way-doh (Mabel). I heard "car" a couple of weeks ago (I'm not holding my breath to hear "taxi" anytime soon). And of course, he says "No" repeating as needed, and "Yeah". I love the "yeah", 'yes and no' one of those concepts that the books say takes a long time to get, so the vocabulary may be small, but the communcation isn't too bad. Plus it is ultra-ultra cute! He gives a little shoulder shrug when he says it.

Today we went to the pediatrician. Jackson weighed in at 26lb 12oz and 34 inches. For the shots, he gave the nurse his best "What you talkin' 'bout Willis" look, but no tears. Good Job!

Fall Fam Fotos

2008-11-05T21:45:00.003-05:00

A few weeks ago, we headed to Gay City State Park to take some family pics. We got there a little late in the day, and lost the light quickly, plus the camera batteries failed us. Still--we managed to get a couple good pics.

I like this one, even though I'm pulling a goofy face.

These pictures really show how Jackson has my droopy eyelids. My mom thinks I should embrace them--100 years ago, they were considered "bedroom eyes" and very demure. You can also see the right dimple Jack and Jason share, and of course the dark eyes. I think they have the same mouth, and probably the same nose, too. I have such cute boys!

soo tired.

2008-10-18T00:34:00.003-04:00

Tonight, I fell asleep on the bed with Jackson at 8:30. It was wonderful. Until 11 when Jackson woke up and tried to roll off the bed in a fit. He eventually slid down, crawled down the hall, and into the bathroom corner behind the toilet. It's now 12:30, and while he's been returned to bed (one with walls this time), he's still crying here and there. I'm not sleeping either. My early to bed became a precious 2.5 hour nap. I would trade it for the usual 7 hours of mildly interrupted sleep.

30 minutes, 1 shotglass of tylenol, and 1 clean diaper later--Jackson is sleeping peacefully. I am not.

Should not have boasted.

2008-10-10T22:39:00.002-04:00

I should not have boasted. The novelty of counting has worn off (already).
So, I'm back to either using the deep mean voice that makes Jack cry, or simply taking things away from him and triggering a tantrum.

Tonight's tantrum over losing his privileges to my giant cocoa butter lip balm (which he was sweetly rubbing on his belly to reduce stretch marks, and then jabbing with his sharp fingers) started on the bed. He threw himself down face first, and, after a few dramatic seconds, started inching toward the edge. I helpfully placed him on the floor. After a few more dramatic seconds, he inched across the room, out the door, down the hall, was stopped by the door at the end, and complained there for several minutes. I walked down the hall and opened the door for him, then walked away. After several more dramatic minutes, he skidded his face across the carpet, and continued to complain his way onto the computer chair. A minute later, the whimpering turned to wailing. I think he got stuck in a standing position, and he'd knocked over the computer speaker. He agreed to allow me to pick him up, then cried quietly and nestled into my shoulder. He cheered up at the prospect of a story.

My child has combined his mother's sensitivity with his father's temper.